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jokerzthe

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jokerzthe

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  • Number of visits : 1211
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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jokerzthe's page activity

Visits<b>tepovre</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 11:14pm

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jokerzthe's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25995) - you deserved it (8213)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after a spate of bad ones, I was in another job interview trying my hardest to give a good impression. After answering a few questions, I realized to my horror that while I was talking I was swiveling my chair from left to right like a nervous child. FML

#19748854
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18104) - you deserved it (4011)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:17am - work - by Swivel - Singapore

Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML

#19740850
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23974) - you deserved it (3744)

On 06/05/2012 at 9:19pm - love - by whyme27 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, when she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML

#19739013
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24279) - you deserved it (5862)

On 06/05/2012 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML

#19737308
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18412) - you deserved it (2096)

On 06/05/2012 at 5:03am - misc - by holyshart - United States

Today, I was on a date with a very intelligent and handsome guy. I was so nervous that when he was telling me about his twin sister, I asked him if they were identical twins. FML

#19731681
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14090) - you deserved it (17474)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:45am - love - by boohoo (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

#19719748
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15032) - you deserved it (28447)

On 06/02/2012 at 6:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML

#19714828
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11892) - you deserved it (41313)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

#19707961
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31525) - you deserved it (4257)

On 05/31/2012 at 1:28am - misc - by gonavybeatarmy - United States (California)

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

#19705817
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17463) - you deserved it (42697)

On 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, while I was waiting to pull out of a parking space, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to put the car into reverse instead of drive while I was waiting for traffic to clear. I don't think the people who own the car behind me were laughing. Nor is my now ex-boyfriend. FML

#19692417
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24467) - you deserved it (2905)

On 05/28/2012 at 5:38am - misc - by Broke (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10525) - you deserved it (40710)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally told my roommate, who doesn't pay rent, to go get a job. He left, came back, and immediately went to my refrigerator to eat. I asked him about his job and what his pay is. Apparently, putting together a bike for a kid is a job. FML

#19671365
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17169) - you deserved it (2341)

On 05/24/2012 at 3:41am - money - by hunterjumper1212 - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

#19644251
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23475) - you deserved it (4758)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25216) - you deserved it (1935)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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