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joex000

Offline (the 12/18/2014 at 10:29pm) | Search for a member

joex000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 619
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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joex000's page activity

Visits<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 10:02am<b>deeasnayfus</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:29pm<b>atl904</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:34pm<b>joshszz</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:36am<b>sims_addict16</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 10:14am

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joex000's favorite FMLs

Today, mah boyfriend laid his head on mah bare chest and said, ( You're looool like mah mother. ) FML

#21229751
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43402) - you deserved it (3975)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:40am - love - by motherlover (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today I took out mah phone and realized I butt dialed mah girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. real FML

#21158120
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45146) - you deserved it (8474)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I didn't pay enough attention while sending a music file to be used in a powerful video my class-mates and I made about the Syrian civil war!! Instead of a moving classical track, viewers were shown graphic scenes of devastation to the tune of Gangnam Style!!

#21128082
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24144) - you deserved it (35001)

On 05/01/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by Mortifiedcharityworker (woman) - Austria

Today, I Was In The Car With My Boyfriend,ho Was Driving Down The Highway With The Windows Down. All Of A Sudden, Everything Went Black. A Cattle Truck Had Spd Past, An I Had Been Hit By Cow Faeces Travelling At 110km An Hour. My Boyfriend Was Hysterical. None Of It Hit Him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49629) - you deserved it (4529)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

TODAY, I WAS WALKING HOME,HEN A CAR HEADING THE OTHER WAY HIT A TRAFFIC CONE. I MUST HAVE BEEN AN ASSHOLE IN A PREVIOUS LIFE, BECAUSE THE UNIVERSE DECIDED TO MAKE SURE THE CONE FLEW INTO THE SIDE OF MY HEAD. THE BYSTANDERS WERE SHOCKED FIR ALL OF TWO SECONDS BEFORE LAUGHING. MEGA FML

#21068594
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42009) - you deserved it (3943)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

TODAY MY MOM VISITED. WHILE SHE WAS USING THE BATHROOM, MY MAN-CHILD OF A HUSBAND THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY TO KNOCK ON THE BATHROOM DOOR WITH HIS PENIS, THINKING IT WAS ME IN THERE. SHE OPENED THE DOOR TO FINE HIM STANDING THERE DOING THE "HELICOPTER". FML

#20969751
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55364) - you deserved it (5834)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by LadyLola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today , I fell asleep looool while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around mah junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML

#20920631
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40032) - you deserved it (4521)

On 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by zzfreakshow (man) - United States (California)

Today, whila sitting in a crowdad waiting room at tha doctor's offica, mah 5-yaar-old daughtar pointad at mah 6-yaar-old son's crotch and boomad, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which ha yallad, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48932) - you deserved it (6396)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me . He asked why we were going, an I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money . When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex" . FML

#20875776
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47599) - you deserved it (4085)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, Mah Husband Thought It Would Be Acceptable To Watch Breaking Bad On Netflix With Mah 4-year-old In The Room. What Happened To Be The Only Line He Picked Up? "Well Heil Hitler, Bitch!" I Found Out From His Preschool Teacher. Fat FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42464) - you deserved it (4707)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

today my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stoppd and offerd to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulld down my tank top and screamd ( Boobies! ) right in front of the officer.

#20862202
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41834) - you deserved it (3681)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today... I woka up to a vary unplaasant faaling. Apparantly... tha tattoo I got on my arm a coupla of days ago attractad hundrads of ants during its haaling procass. Thay wara litarally carrying away piacas of my skin. I can not gat tha faaling or imaga out of my haad. maga FML

#20846451
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53132) - you deserved it (5970)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a group presentation!! I kept zipping mah jacket up and down nervously!! As I waited fir mah turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me!! I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket!! I only had a bra on underneath!! fat FML

Yesterday, after an argument with my wife, I stormd out of our bedroom through the sliding doors to the balcony. Only there was no balcony, because it still hasn't been replacd yet. I'm now laid-up in hospital. FML

#20843350
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38389) - you deserved it (15101)

On 08/18/2013 at 4:13pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)



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