jmickinleymiller

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Offline (the 12/01/2015 at 3:44pm)

jmickinleymiller

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4097
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jmickinleymiller's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

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jmickinleymiller's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that the only way to get my boyfriend to respond to me is through nudes. FML

Today, my mother called me a slut and unladylike because I prefer beer instead of wine. Apparently, beer's only for "unladylike sluts". FML

by BeerSlut / 09/02/2015 at 5:37pm / Portugal (Vila Real) / Miscellaneous

Today, I expressed my feelings to a guy I've liked for a long time. He basically turned me down because I have the same name as his mom, and dating me would be too weird. FML

by wellthen / 08/24/2015 at 5:56pm / United States / Love

Today, after hearing the doctor saying my girlfriend can never be pregnant, I got a bit too excited. I'm currently on the 5th hour of the silent treatment. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2015 at 4:33am / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, and he asked me to tell him what I wanted him to do. I said I wanted him to make me scream and cum. To which he replied, "Okay, be realistic now". FML

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, I pushed all the way in. She said, "Stop teasing me, put everything in." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2015 at 10:23pm / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Intimacy

Today, I got all excited because I thought my crush was flirting with me, when in actuality she was taking advantage of me liking her so she and her friends could make fun of my speech impediment. FML

by SY5623 / 08/11/2015 at 8:00pm / United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, a kid on a bike passed me and commented on my "big fat butt." Recognizing him from the neighborhood, I told my husband to go speak to his parents about the inappropriate comment. It turns out his father is the man who yesterday commented on my "big bouncing tits." FML

by Mrs. W. / 08/10/2015 at 8:32pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2015 at 9:28pm / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, my parents sent me to the hospital because they thought I had diabetes. One of the symptoms is that you a pee a lot. The only reason I go to the bathroom so often is so I can masturbate. FML

by doodoobref / 07/31/2015 at 1:38am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I was laying in bed facing my dad. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed he became interested in something behind me. I turn around to the sight of my mom lifting up her shirt, flashing her boobs. FML

by madisonnkelly / 07/05/2015 at 11:18pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months was showing me his new phone. He accidentally opened his gallery, which contains 3 photos: one of his motorcycle, one of his new game console, and a naked photo of his ex. FML

by wellthatsucks / 07/05/2015 at 3:18pm / United States / Love

Today, the 4-year-old I was babysitting came up to me all happy, saying she went to the bathroom like a "big girl". Knowing she was just potty trained, I asked if she'd remembered to flush. Looking at me confused, she said, "But it's in my room." FML

by AdoKitty / 06/10/2015 at 11:04pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML

by its still broken / 06/10/2015 at 8:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I am going to take a law school test. My Mom told me to relax, so I told her, "I'm better at stressing out, so I have something to fall back on if I bomb the test." To which she replied, "And masturbating, you've always excelled at that." FML

by LZapped / 06/08/2015 at 9:35am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy