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jlt93

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jlt93

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 August 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 703
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jlt93's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

#16516164
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16622) - you deserved it (41438)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55594) - you deserved it (4266)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55594) - you deserved it (4266)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the sewers in my town became overloaded. My basement is now filled with other people's poo. FML

#16454235
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39807) - you deserved it (2752)

On 06/01/2011 at 4:40pm - misc - by L -

Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

#16416725
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51264) - you deserved it (4579)

On 05/30/2011 at 11:46am - misc - by Jess - United States

Today, I inexplicably claimed ownership of someone else's fart in the subway. FML

#16341227
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9401) - you deserved it (32582)

On 05/25/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by anonymous - Singapore

Today, I discovered my wife has a YouTube channel dedicated to 20 second videos of her wearing a fake mustache and making weird sounds. FML

#16076748
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41921) - you deserved it (6906)

On 05/07/2011 at 9:56am - love - by wtfiswrongwithher - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML

Today, I decided to start my exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident and motivated about getting in shape, I realized that my window was wide open and my neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving my arms in the air like an idiot. FML

#15855723
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13943) - you deserved it (22519)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:27am - misc - by JenniWearsPrada -

Today, I'm a student vet. Part of my holiday work is to gain experience working at a dairy. A cow came on to the platform for me to inject her udder. As I was bent over, she decided to take a dump. Onto my left eyeball. FML

#15855335
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40622) - you deserved it (5594)

On 04/20/2011 at 3:27am - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I brought my own thermos of coffee on the train with me, the kind that flips open to uncover the mouth part. I take a few swigs and notice a cute boy nervously smiling at me. Suddenly, I feel something drip down my nose. The flip part was leaving drops of coffee all over my forehead. FML

#15689448
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20702) - you deserved it (5615)

On 04/08/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said: "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

#15662595
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30539) - you deserved it (4935)

On 04/06/2011 at 7:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

#15583575
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25206) - you deserved it (32277)

On 04/01/2011 at 12:32am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32195) - you deserved it (6507)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML

#14330238
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30077) - you deserved it (3227)

On 12/25/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)



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