jlarae12

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jlarae12

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8291
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jlarae12 : Heyy (:
Wanna know anything? Ask me. I enjoy meeting new people (:

jlarae12's page activity

Visits<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 11:47am<b>infamousbassist</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 1:44pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 3:57am<b>cokeman666</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 8:52am<b>eatdaussy69lol</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:21am<b>gaspargan</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 2:29am<b>zidiko</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 12:43pm<b>daisysmily</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 9:35pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 7:05am<b>crzycookie</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 12:36am<b>treygalloway</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 5:19pm<b>oj101</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 5:04am<b>efelsh</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 5:29pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 8:34am<b>WhoaIsMe93</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 6:44pm<b>jaala123</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 6:09pm<b>pumboc</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 7:00pm<b>Jwcsway</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 8:33am

jlarae12's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

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jlarae12's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, in the bathroom during the ACTs, my hair got stuck in the electric hand dryer. I had to rip my hair out. For future reference, hair + hand dryer = dreadlocks. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2009 at 6:16pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I wanted to use my gift card for a liquor store. I went to pay the cashier, who said he needed to see my license. I gave it to him as well as my gift card. After paying, he asked me if I wanted him to cut it up, since the card was now worth $0. I said yes. He cut the wrong card. FML

by bryans_fresh / 06/12/2009 at 7:35pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my left-handed boss needed PC help. I said "right-click for the menu." She said nothing happened. Three times we went through this. Eventually I went over, asking her to show me what she did. She was using her right hand on the left mouse button. She earns £10,000 more than me. FML

by girlfriday / 06/11/2009 at 11:21am / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, my left-handed boss needed PC help. I said "right-click for the menu." She said nothing happened. Three times we went through this. Eventually I went over, asking her to show me what she did. She was using her right hand on the left mouse button. She earns £10,000 more than me. FML

by girlfriday / 06/11/2009 at 11:21am / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, I was doing the laundry, but couldn't tell if one basket contained dirty clothes or clean clothes. I put my head down into the basket and took a whiff to check, and smelled something strong. I looked down and noticed I had shoved my nose into my mother's dirty panties and inhaled deeply. FML

by potpurri_needed / 06/10/2009 at 1:37pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML

by guamfml / 06/02/2009 at 8:10pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

by fmlfmlfml / 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

by Cail / 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a job interview. I had to drop my daughter off with my babysitter first. When I got to the interview I got a weird look from the vice president of the company. I had lime green poop running down the side of my white blouse. FML

by boo / 05/27/2009 at 2:15pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my mom talked about how it's interesting how there's so many different size of penises. She also told me that since she's doing hormone therapy she's able to orgasm a LOT more. We were stuck in stop and go traffic for 3 hours. When I turned on the radio, she turned it off and talked more. FML

by ITSnotFUNNYtoMEass / 05/25/2009 at 4:54am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

by untitledentity / 05/24/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

by honeymoondisaster / 05/23/2009 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, a little girl at work was coloring a picture that said "Best Dad" on it. Wanting to be nice I asked her if she was making it for her dad for father's day. She looked at me with a sad face and said, "I don't have a dad..." FML

by zbaby / 05/23/2009 at 12:03am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy