Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

jlarae12

Search for a member

jlarae12
  • Town/Country : Indiana, America
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 468
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jlarae12 : Heyy (:
Wanna know anything? Ask me. I enjoy meeting new people (:

jlarae12's last visitors

waffule365crzycookieoj101infamousbassistefelshCovenant74MisterCrossWhoaIsMe93jaala123pumbocJwcsway

jlarae12's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of jlarae12's badges

jlarae12's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a pound of cooked bacon in the dryer. When I asked my roommate about it, he confessed; his excuse was that he wanted to dry up the grease before eating it. FML

Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML

#20601896
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47030) - you deserved it (7536)

On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States

Today, I had to explain to a woman why she wasn't allowed to squeeze all the contents of the sample lotion bottle into her own bottle. She threw a fit, and dumped the whole bottle on my head. FML

#20601226
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37198) - you deserved it (3122)

On 04/18/2013 at 12:00am - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the catchy Japanese song I've been obsessed with for the past week is actually about a dildo. FML

Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML

#20599149
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33460) - you deserved it (6497)

On 04/17/2013 at 11:14am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, in my psychology class we were covering OCDs. I have an issue with creased paper and my best friend brought it up, so for the next hour my class mates sat screwing up paper to see how long I could continuously have a panic attack. FML

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

#20598564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52650) - you deserved it (9110)

On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. A few hours later, we discovered he's highly allergic to my Summer's Eve soap. He looks like he's been attacked by bees. Yay for losing my v-card. FML

#20597351
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36310) - you deserved it (5848)

On 04/16/2013 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML

#20597317
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28970) - you deserved it (2844)

On 04/16/2013 at 7:13pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML

#20584129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38090) - you deserved it (8651)

On 04/10/2013 at 8:45pm - kids - by Me - United States (California)

Today, my English teacher used the word "interpretate" again. This isn't the only mistake she's made though; I've been so frustrated that I've started a list of them. It's over a page long. I'm meant to be learning things from this woman. FML

#20582580
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27446) - you deserved it (2551)

On 04/09/2013 at 7:09pm - work - by Annoyed Student - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML

#20582376
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42971) - you deserved it (3483)

On 04/09/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40601) - you deserved it (4302)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

#20581667
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57580) - you deserved it (1857)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I had to get my grandparents out of jail, because they were caught having sex in a public place. They excused their actions by saying that you can only be young and stupid once, so if you continue doing stupid actions, you are still young. FML



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Break that FML
  • Hello everybody! It's great to be back to present you with a new artist. Well, two artists actually. We don't often publish artists that work as a team, and today is all the more interesting because we're…

Wednesday 15 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: