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jixan

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jixan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 3613
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jixan's page activity

Visits<b>depinaariana</b> - the 07/14/2009 at 11:19pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 5:05pm<b>brianflinn</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 5:45am

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jixan's favorite FMLs

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

#3019033
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11620) - you deserved it (110878)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36145) - you deserved it (61397)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was walking down the sidewalk and heard a little girl ask her dad why I had blue hair. He said, "Sometimes drugs will make people do stupid things." FML

#2485875
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39589) - you deserved it (35940)

On 05/31/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by bluehairedfreakgirl (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

#1793303
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30296) - you deserved it (47833)

On 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm - work - by Failoffel (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized my wedding ring was missing. Turns out, my son had taken it to give to a girl he likes in the 2nd grade. FML

#1706797
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71597) - you deserved it (8075)

On 05/06/2009 at 11:47pm - kids - by fmal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

#1643455
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18998) - you deserved it (43180)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:46pm - kids - by Jon (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he gets a call from his best friend whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzips his pants and mouths, "She won't know." FML

#1404603
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65131) - you deserved it (6812)

On 04/27/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got pulled over while dancing to crazy techno beats in the car. The officer RAN out of his car and up to mine and pounded on my window. He thought I was having a seizure. FML

#1292437
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44758) - you deserved it (19635)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by bdutton (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
927 comments

I agree, your life sucks (350730) - you deserved it (38699)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

#818828
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64486) - you deserved it (17692)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (176774) - you deserved it (11884)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML

#683803
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63889) - you deserved it (23704)

On 03/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by Hotsauce887 (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was on a subway with my boyfriend and it was stopping so I grabbed the pole for support. I felt another hand grabbing onto the pole knowing it was my boyfriend's. Without looking I carressed and tickled his hand. I turned around to smile at my boyfriend. The hand wasn't his. FML

#135942
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8932) - you deserved it (34972)

On 02/25/2009 at 6:56pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidentally texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiancé, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML

#133313
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27943) - you deserved it (40067)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:05pm - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

#32415
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82826) - you deserved it (10957)

On 02/12/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by janedoe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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