About jiequals3 : “Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft!”
-- Theodore Roosevelt
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend who has been overseas the last four months broke up with me. I sent him a care package two days ago. He'll get homemade cookies (his mom's recipe), naughty videos of me and a letter telling him how much I love him in about a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63072) - you deserved it (4637)
On 05/14/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by bettycrocker (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend who has been overseas the last four months broke up with me. I sent him a care package two days ago. He'll get homemade cookies (his mom's recipe), naughty videos of me and a letter telling him how much I love him in about a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63072) - you deserved it (4637)
On 05/14/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by bettycrocker (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14019) - you deserved it (85825)
On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was home on leave and having breakfast with my parents and my younger brothers. I guess I got too used to the rougher language around the Army barracks where I'm stationed. At the breakfast table I asked my Mom to "pass me the f***ing butter". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22148) - you deserved it (59386)
On 05/14/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)
Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50270) - you deserved it (5201)
On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was wearing my new sunglasses while watching a basketball game. A pretty hot looking girl was sitting a few spots next to me so I stared at her breasts. A few minutes later, I looked up at her face and she was looking at me in disgust. It turns out that my sunglasses were see through. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5522) - you deserved it (63468)
On 05/13/2009 at 7:26pm - misc - by rackman007 (man) - United States (Maine)
Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34407) - you deserved it (14436)
On 05/13/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9110) - you deserved it (61114)
On 05/12/2009 at 10:23am - misc - by Permafucked (woman) - United States (South Dakota)
Today, I woke up at 4:30am because I forgot to turn my Blackberry off 'loud'. I woke up to find an email from my ex-boyfriend's crazy mother who had sent me pictures of her son's wedding that had happened over the weekend. I am still single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46199) - you deserved it (2981)
On 05/12/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by freckle82 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18443) - you deserved it (45409)
On 05/12/2009 at 7:09am - misc - by Rech (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped grabbed the ball for the kid and started to hand it to him. He then yelled "Stranger Danger" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30mins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50668) - you deserved it (2368)
On 05/12/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by TheJoker (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69113) - you deserved it (5353)
On 05/12/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by Karmas3itch - United States (Ohio)
Today, I decided I didn't care about my pride, and so I asked this girl out in a text. After an hour of no responce I asked again. Later I got a text saying, "I'm sorry, This is Emily's mom. Emily isn't here at the moment, but if I were you, I wouldn't ask again." I was rejected by her mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43870) - you deserved it (11859)
On 05/11/2009 at 9:25pm - love - by ConnorFails (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, it's the five year anniversary of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (74020) - you deserved it (7591)
On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by bezoar10 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I told my parents that I was going out with my boyfriend and they agreed to let me go as long as I was home by midnight. Did I come home on time? Yes. Was my shirt right side out? No. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18745) - you deserved it (87249)
On 05/10/2009 at 4:25pm - intimacy - by insideout (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Monday 17 June 2013
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