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jiequals3

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jiequals3
  • Town/Country : Huntsville, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 March 1994 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 14240
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About jiequals3 : “Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft!”

-- Theodore Roosevelt

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jiequals3's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

#1930454
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14314) - you deserved it (87486)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML

#1918683
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55592) - you deserved it (6606)

On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was wearing my new sunglasses while watching a basketball game. A pretty hot looking girl was sitting a few spots next to me so I stared at her breasts. A few minutes later, I looked up at her face and she was looking at me in disgust. It turns out that my sunglasses were see through. FML

#1912773
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6827) - you deserved it (79751)

On 05/13/2009 at 7:26pm - misc - by rackman007 (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML

#1905564
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36319) - you deserved it (17412)

On 05/13/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

#1869904
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10048) - you deserved it (73733)

On 05/12/2009 at 10:23am - misc - by Permafucked (woman) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I woke up at 4:30am because I forgot to turn my Blackberry off 'loud'. I woke up to find an email from my ex-boyfriend's crazy mother who had sent me pictures of her son's wedding that had happened over the weekend. I am still single. FML

#1869092
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49784) - you deserved it (3735)

On 05/12/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by freckle82 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped grabbed the ball for the kid and started to hand it to him. He then yelled "Stranger Danger" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30mins. FML

#1864532
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54290) - you deserved it (2593)

On 05/12/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by TheJoker (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML

#1862791
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71442) - you deserved it (5515)

On 05/12/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by Karmas3itch - United States (Ohio)

Today, I decided I didn't care about my pride, and so I asked this girl out in a text. After an hour of no response I asked again. Later I got a text saying, "I'm sorry, This is Emily's mom. Emily isn't here at the moment, but if I were you, I wouldn't ask again." I was rejected by her mom. FML

#1858879
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47919) - you deserved it (14882)

On 05/11/2009 at 9:25pm - love - by ConnorFails (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it's the five year anniversary of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML

#1845741
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81794) - you deserved it (9611)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by bezoar10 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71266) - you deserved it (7974)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

#1800346
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55163) - you deserved it (5342)

On 05/10/2009 at 1:05am - kids - by sucksforme. (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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