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jhavranek

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jhavranek

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  • Number of visits : 981
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jhavranek's FML badges

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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jhavranek's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36719) - you deserved it (12457)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

#20974338
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22590) - you deserved it (35872)

On 11/29/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

#20974086
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40692) - you deserved it (41274)

On 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by OuchImAMoron (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my family and I finished moving to Texas. As if that isn't bad enough, I'll have to introduce myself all over again to everyone I meet and explain that yes, my parents really did name me Lilypad. FML

#20973574
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45949) - you deserved it (3797)

On 11/28/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML

#20963219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (2492)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:00am - health - by seizuregirl17 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was jogging on my farm when I discovered a cave. Unfortunately for me, I discovered said cave by tripping and falling into it where there was still a 10ft drop to the bottom. FML

Today, my mom bitched me out for still being single at age 19, and still not having started a family. She considers this "immoral," yet showed nothing but praise for my sister, who's pregnant at 15 and doesn't know which of three guys is the father. FML

#20960837
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57840) - you deserved it (2684)

On 11/17/2013 at 12:46pm - misc - by failed brood mare (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was watching TV when my sister-in-law called me, laughing. It turns out my brother got his head stuck between the bars on the stairs. Again. My brother is 29. FML

#20957769
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36705) - you deserved it (2681)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:44pm - misc - by AshlynnPrime - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML

#20956092
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54177) - you deserved it (3200)

On 11/13/2013 at 6:08am - kids - by little_star78 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked a co-worker why he was wearing sandals, as they are not allowed under our strict dress code. He got extremely angry with me and stormed off. Ten minutes later, I got called into our boss' office. Apparently, he told her that I walked up to him and asked to suck his toes. FML

#20956059
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40338) - you deserved it (3547)

On 11/13/2013 at 4:00am - work - by feetfreak (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

#20955991
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45918) - you deserved it (12087)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister introduced our parents to her new boyfriend. He's my boyfriend, and he told me he was going to be out of state for a few weeks on business. FML

Today, the day before I'm supposed to leave for a long-anticipated trip to Europe, my mother admitted that she's never paid for it. She only told me she did so I would stop hinting that I wanted to go. I gave up Christmas for this trip. FML

Today, I was quizzing a girl at my college, and I noticed that when she answered a question, her ears wiggled. It was cute, so I pointed it out. She burst into tears, and the guy next to me said, "Way to make her feel insecure, douchebag." FML

Today, my girlfriend "got even" with me after an argument by telling people that I've been beating her. Three guys later came over to my place and beat the crap out of me. Her reaction: "I didn't think they'd take it so serious!" FML



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