About jesse91 : I'm a 22 year old gamer who is also interested in psychology, movies, comics and history.
I'm a big fan of Assassins Creed and Mass Effect, among many others.
Get out of my swamp you kids!
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Today, my dream finally came true, I slept with the woman I love. Sadly, after that I got friend-zoned, because she's in love with my brother, and she wanted my help to get to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23932) - you deserved it (1930)
On 04/04/2012 at 12:41pm - love - by Sociallyawkwardpenguin (man) - Sent from mobile version
Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13167) - you deserved it (1237)
On 03/26/2012 at 12:31am - misc - by Ringo McDingo (man) - United States
Today, I found out why teenage boys have "Keep out" and "Please knock" signs on their bedroom doors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7490) - you deserved it (32809)
On 03/19/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by ari - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15173) - you deserved it (8052)
On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34898) - you deserved it (2888)
On 03/16/2012 at 6:38am - love - by elisabeth_pwnes - Norway (Vestfold)
Today, I was watching a kid at school walk like a gangster. My teacher was standing there, so I stood behind the kid and walked like him, laughing to myself, at which point my teacher took me to one side and told me the kid was handicapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6914) - you deserved it (38347)
On 03/14/2012 at 4:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5053) - you deserved it (22849)
On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States
Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28474) - you deserved it (4127)
On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out I've miserably failed a college exam. My friend had agreed to pass me answers if I needed them, since I've hardly studied this year. We were on the phone when she said, "Oh, those answers were bullshit. Serves you right, huh?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (5564) - you deserved it (46828)
On 03/10/2012 at 5:48pm - misc - by Alison (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my new roommate told me he was bisexual. A little concerned, I opened up and told him that made me uncomfortable. His reply: "Oh don't worry, I'm only attracted to good looking guys." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9814) - you deserved it (38493)
On 03/07/2012 at 9:01am - misc - by Leland - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24590) - you deserved it (1306)
On 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by sdk2010 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24590) - you deserved it (1306)
On 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by sdk2010 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I texted my mom if she could pick me up from the hospital. She replied "No fatty, walk home." I have a broken foot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26530) - you deserved it (2394)
On 03/06/2012 at 6:50am - health - by FootyFoot (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24017) - you deserved it (3321)
On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28605) - you deserved it (1724)
On 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by ouch (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Monday 17 June 2013
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