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jesse91

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jesse91

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3765
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jesse91 : I'm a gamer who is also interested in psychology, languages, movies, comics and history.

I'm a big fan of Dragon Age, Assassins Creed and Mass Effect, among many others.

Get out of my swamp you kids!

jesse91's page activity

Visits<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 9:24pm<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 10:42am<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 1:26am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 12:21pm<b>hatemyluck</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 12:23am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 7:16pm<b>DaDezza244</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 6:29am<b>Tika876</b> - the 03/30/2013 at 12:34pm<b>thrAsHeRr9081</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 10:12pm<b>countrygirl3250</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 12:42am<b>aw3som3sauc3</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 3:08pm<b>miwako</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 10:36am<b>mentalkayse</b> - the 11/18/2012 at 8:31pm<b>Miss_Lisaa</b> - the 09/22/2012 at 6:17pm<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 09/13/2012 at 4:50pm<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 08/02/2012 at 4:39pm<b>nela25</b> - the 08/01/2012 at 6:28pm<b>kiwi2006</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 1:59pm

jesse91's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of jesse91's badges

jesse91's favorite FMLs

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

#20074336
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15379) - you deserved it (2442)

On 09/16/2012 at 9:46am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, for the first time in a week, a customer entered my store. He needed to use the bathroom. FML

#20073639
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22075) - you deserved it (1945)

On 09/15/2012 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML

#20073442
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19559) - you deserved it (3239)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by FullMonty (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML

#20073337
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27697) - you deserved it (6164)

On 09/15/2012 at 6:16pm - love - by hannah (woman) - New Zealand (Marlborough)

Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML

#20073029
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5507) - you deserved it (27715)

On 09/15/2012 at 2:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast". That is not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML

#20072637
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17211) - you deserved it (1482)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:07am - health - by Leashaness (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML

#20072449
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22669) - you deserved it (2041)

On 09/15/2012 at 1:35am - intimacy - by anon (man) - United States (California)

Today, the gas company came to connect our stove for free. While here, they broke our hot water heater, shut it off, and issued us a hazard notice. We can fix it, but they won't be able to come back for another two weeks to turn the gas back on. We don't have any hot water until then. FML

#20072391
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18698) - you deserved it (1346)

On 09/15/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was showing me photos on his iPod when he came across a photo of a half-naked girl. He tried to play it off by quickly changing it, only to reveal even more half-naked girls. FML

#20065430
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23842) - you deserved it (2676)

On 09/09/2012 at 10:12pm - love - by hatemyluck (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was talking to an art critic at an exhibition. He told me that the artist had no talent and went on to tell me everything wrong with each painting. I'd painted them all. FML

#20065231
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15795) - you deserved it (1665)

On 09/09/2012 at 8:12pm - work - by the bad artist - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, during a family dinner, my favourite underwire bra got tired of its job and tried to shish-kebab my boobs. FML

#20065022
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19141) - you deserved it (1861)

On 09/09/2012 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML

#20064384
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23716) - you deserved it (5845)

On 09/09/2012 at 8:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I snuck out to go see my girlfriend. When I got to her house, I left my bike out front and we went on a nice walk around the block. We passed a homeless-looking woman going the opposite way. About ten minutes later, the same woman passed us, on my bike. FML

#20064141
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17167) - you deserved it (9140)

On 09/09/2012 at 1:38am - misc - by crabmunch15 - United States (California)

Today, my father bet me $200 that since my boyfriend is "such a stupid shit," he wouldn't be able to locate Paraguay on a map. I gladly accepted the bet. Not only did he not know where it is, he actually accused us of making the country up. FML

#20063309
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14764) - you deserved it (9373)

On 09/08/2012 at 3:16pm - misc - by dating a fucking idiot (woman) - United States

Today, I got into an argument with my mom over her sexist, emotionally-abusive boyfriend. I told her that either he goes or I go. She called me a disrespectful bastard for not respecting my "new father." I'm now sitting outside a McDonald's with my suitcase, leeching their WiFi. FML

#20063189
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31338) - you deserved it (2290)

On 09/08/2012 at 1:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



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