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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 January 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2967
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jbird1193 : I wanna know who follows me around and puts my whole life on this site. Anyway, message me. I dare you.

jbird1193's page activity

Visits<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 9:10pm<b>BonerFart</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:53pm<b>2senpai4u</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 7:32pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 7:23am<b>tswiftbaby</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:25am<b>ckeekymontag</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 7:14pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 7:39pm<b>squirrel13</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 10:00pm<b>wjsgkrbs</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 9:17pm<b>josieeeeeee_</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 8:22am<b>IDontLikeYou_cx</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 10:18pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 6:54pm<b>abby1029</b> - the 11/16/2012 at 3:22pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 08/16/2012 at 2:02pm<b>angel_quis</b> - the 11/17/2011 at 3:38pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:48pm<b>Mr_Alarm</b> - the 08/31/2011 at 1:47pm<b>Djibril</b> - the 06/13/2011 at 12:18pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 1:23pm<b>squirrel13</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 4:00am

jbird1193's FML badges


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

jbird1193's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

by FrOsTy25 / 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option. FML

by andimanastudent / 04/13/2011 at 5:44pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, my high school guidance counselor tried to convince me NOT to go to college, mainly because it's been so long since someone from my high school went to college, that she got rid of all the college information she used to have. FML

by CollegeBoy / 04/13/2011 at 9:07am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, at 6am I was waiting for the tram to go home from my late night job. A homeless man came up to me and offered to buy me a beer because "guys like us have to stick together." FML

by ihaveahome / 04/12/2011 at 12:02pm / Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my unemployed 29-year-old son, who still lives with us, reading the work section of the newspaper and prayed that he was looking for a job. He was looking for the comics. FML

by JT / 04/12/2011 at 10:19am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

by anon / 04/12/2011 at 6:09am / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML

by BrokeAndPsst / 04/12/2011 at 12:27am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I've been on the same train for two hours at a standstill due to "signal problems". We can't get off because it's "unsafe". I'm on my way home from work and I can see my house through the window. FML

by bananaman / 04/11/2011 at 4:07pm / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation

Today, I was robbed. They took my father's ashes. FML

by stolen / 04/11/2011 at 3:29pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML

by CheeseyPotatoes / 04/11/2011 at 9:16am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML

by blower / 04/11/2011 at 12:01am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2011 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Love

Today, I found out that our neighbors told almost everyone on our street that I was mentally handicapped. All this time I wasn't sure why they would speak slowly and loudly at me. Now they won't believe me when I tell them I'm a 4.0 GPA student. FML

by Imslow / 04/05/2011 at 12:40pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML

by Abyssal / 04/04/2011 at 2:29pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, I went up to a girl at a bus stop and started chatting her up. Her response? "Am I being robbed?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 2:15am / Mozambique (Maputo) / Miscellaneous