jbird1193

Search for a member

jbird1193

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 January 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2588
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jbird1193 : I wanna know who follows me around and puts my whole life on this site. Anyway, message me. I dare you.

jbird1193's page activity

Visits<b>2senpai4u</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 7:32pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 7:23am<b>tswiftbaby</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:25am<b>ckeekymontag</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 7:14pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 7:39pm<b>squirrel13</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 10:00pm<b>wjsgkrbs</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 9:17pm<b>josieeeeeee_</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 8:22am<b>IDontLikeYou_cx</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 10:18pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 6:54pm<b>abby1029</b> - the 11/16/2012 at 3:22pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 08/16/2012 at 2:02pm<b>angel_quis</b> - the 11/17/2011 at 3:38pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:48pm<b>Mr_Alarm</b> - the 08/31/2011 at 1:47pm<b>Djibril</b> - the 06/13/2011 at 12:18pm<b>figureskates2344</b> - the 06/12/2011 at 6:08pm<b>littlesunshine</b> - the 05/31/2011 at 3:42pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 1:23pm<b>squirrel13</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 4:00am

jbird1193's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

jbird1193's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of two years told me I was being too obsessive. This is the guy who has gone through my phone two separate times and deleted all of my male contacts. FML

by alissa_roar / 04/18/2011 at 1:54pm / United States / Love

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's house. I had a shower while he went downstairs. As I went to say goodbye to him, his mother muttered "slut" while pouring him orange juice. FML

by sllaggy / 04/18/2011 at 5:34am / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from a girl I was seeing. She said that she was falling for someone else, but she still liked me and couldn't decide what to do. Being the romantic (idiot) I am, I told her that she should do what would make her happiest, thinking that she would pick me. She didn't. FML

Today, my husband and I were diagnosed with herpes. We've been together for five years and were both virgins before. Even the doctor couldn't give any other explanation. FML

by bumpyroad / 04/17/2011 at 10:29am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML

by rastafarimon / 04/17/2011 at 1:56am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

by overflowing / 04/16/2011 at 6:20pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

by bbedlock / 04/16/2011 at 8:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML

by Username / 04/16/2011 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss friend-requested me on Facebook. My profile picture is of me licking his employee of the month picture for a dare. FML

by asdfjkl / 04/15/2011 at 3:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I woke up with my eye swollen half shut. To spare the embarrassment, I asked my mom if I could stay home from school. She said no, but also attempted to make me feel better by saying that with my eye, my acne was unnoticeable. FML

by madi / 04/15/2011 at 3:13pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

by spiderwoman / 04/15/2011 at 7:47am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Animals

Today, my husband of 30 years told me that he thought we should 'just be friends'. FML

by ZaraAce / 04/15/2011 at 7:38am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Love

Today, I found my dead phone that had been missing for two weeks. I turned it on to see that I had only gotten 2 text messages during the two weeks. They were both from my mother. FML

by Anonymous / 04/15/2011 at 2:57am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I held a door open for my boyfriend and jokingly said, "Chivalry is dead?" He responded with, "Who's chivalry?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bumped into an old school friend. I'd heard she was pregnant so the first thing I did was congratulate her. Not only was she not pregnant, but the reason she managed to get so fat was because of comfort eating due to her miscarriage last month. FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2011 at 9:06pm / United Kingdom / Health