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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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itschris

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itschris
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1683
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

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itschris's favorite FMLs

Today, while driving home with my boyfriend, we started discussing how clean our driving records were. I was boasting about how I'd never been in an accident when I hit a moose. FML

#14130946 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (6550) - you deserved it (19044)

On 12/08/2010 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend refused to have his hair treated against lice, because "men don't have lice". FML

#14130110 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (19456) - you deserved it (2457)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:56am - health - by scratchy (woman) - Israel (HaDarom)

Today, I held a presentation about my masters thesis. Turns out, my professor never ever actually read the drafts I'd given him, but decided to rip me to pieces in front of everyone, saying that the topic isn't worth researching. I've been working on it for six months. FML

#14128873 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (23631) - you deserved it (1550)

On 12/08/2010 at 5:30am - work - by nograd4mee (woman) - Germany

Today, I found out that the woman I'm currently dating used to be a man. FML

#14105227 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (44239) - you deserved it (6773)

On 12/06/2010 at 7:24am - intimacy - by swindstorm -

Today, I walked into my room to find my roommate's boyfriend trying on one of my pink, lacy bras. My roommate then yelled at me for coming home early. FML

#14103618 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (23959) - you deserved it (1775)

On 12/06/2010 at 2:20am - intimacy - by FreakinthePink -

Today, my five year old son was sick with a stomach bug. He didn't want to leave my side so I decided to grab a bowl from the kitchen for him to puke into. The thing is, it was dark in the kitchen and I accidentally grabbed a strainer. My new outfit is now ruined. FML

#14103046 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (7815) - you deserved it (18588)

On 12/06/2010 at 1:17am - kids - by Hunter -

Today, a customer tried to pay for a $1.55 cup of coffee with a gift card, but he came up a dollar short. He let another customer through while he fumbled in his pocket for money. I later noticed a dollar had disappeared from my tip jar. FML

#14095339 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (17069) - you deserved it (2368)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:36pm - work - by barista (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went into labor with my first child, and as much as I pleaded, I had to wait for my husband to finish his raid in World of Warcraft before he'd take me to the hospital. FML

#14093813 (363)

I agree, your life sucks (52638) - you deserved it (7602)

On 12/05/2010 at 8:38am - health - by newmother (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

#13969398 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (11617) - you deserved it (16265)

On 11/25/2010 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my best friend thought it would look cool if I recorded her swinging while lying under the swing. She ended up kicking me in the face and laughing so hard she pissed on me. FML

#12522582 (301)

I agree, your life sucks (26868) - you deserved it (13378)

On 08/14/2010 at 4:43pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML

#6179054 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (18419) - you deserved it (3417)

On 11/06/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ShittyKeys (man) - United States (California)

Today, I bought a safe. I put all of my most prized possessions in it, including all of my jewelry, family heirlooms and important papers. Oh, and just before I locked it up, I put the key to the safe in there too. FML

#5853420 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (6896) - you deserved it (31184)

On 10/16/2009 at 5:02pm - misc - by smarty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at soccer camp and was hit in the face with a ball. I walked to the nurse and asked for a napkin or tissues to help stop the bleeding. The only thing she could come up with? A tampon. I spent 20 minutes with a tampon shoved up my nostril in front of my laughing teammates. FML

#5804485 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (18149) - you deserved it (2247)

On 10/12/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was carrying several bags of groceries up the stairs to my 3rd story apartment when I saw a giant rat climbing down the wall towards me. I screamed and dropped my groceries, which went over the rail and landed on the bottom floor, destroying them all. The rat? Just a big leaf. FML

#5798950 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (6735) - you deserved it (20891)

On 10/12/2009 at 4:19pm - misc - by n_london (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML

#5796915 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (24164) - you deserved it (5978)

On 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm - health - by Few_Absolutes (woman) - United States (Maryland)