issoz

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issoz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 26 July 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1463
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About issoz : I'm a G. Nah I ain't shit, but a bored Muffukka!

issoz's page activity

Visits<b>Skylae</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 5:57pm<b>Mizzesbestie</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 11:42am<b>paramedicine</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 2:55am<b>HollyoaksFan93</b> - the 02/14/2012 at 7:08pm<b>soccerchick_1994</b> - the 01/08/2012 at 4:53pm<b>fthislyfe</b> - the 09/22/2011 at 10:10am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:16pm<b>babelini</b> - the 08/07/2011 at 10:59am<b>urcadox</b> - the 08/07/2011 at 10:44am<b>Madelinexo</b> - the 07/22/2011 at 5:50pm<b>EnlightenedTeen</b> - the 05/20/2011 at 1:06pm<b>Quinn0234</b> - the 05/17/2011 at 6:24pm<b>coco666maggot</b> - the 05/17/2011 at 12:53pm

issoz's FML badges

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issoz's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a parking ticket in the mail. I don't have a car. FML

by Roxas / 02/14/2011 at 12:20am / United States (Virginia) / Transportation

Today, I was walking in the park with my boyfriend of 3 years. He stopped and knelt down in front of me. I started to panic, then he told me to calm down, my shoe was untied. FML

by maddie! / 02/09/2011 at 12:48pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at a family gathering for New Years, my aunt said she needed a flat surface to write on. My dad immediately piped up, "Why don't you use Samantha's chest?" I'm Samantha. I'm also 18. FML

by ilik3catz / 12/31/2010 at 7:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my date arrived far earlier than expected to pick me up. Apparently my mother decided to show him to my room anyway. When the door swung open, I happened to be butt naked in front of the mirror, trying to pick out an ingrown hair on my bum. FML

by stubblebutt / 11/13/2009 at 7:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my best friend out for a night in town, after he got dumped by his girlfriend recently. As we were walking around, we passed a group of hot women, a couple who were checking him out. Trying to be encouraging, I said "He's single!" and winked. One of the girls was his ex-girlfriend. FML

by badbestfriend / 08/04/2009 at 12:15pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML

by dumbo / 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend. I called him and started yelling at him over the phone. He told me that if I wanted to end the relationship I should just hang up the phone right then. Before I could say I still love him and don't want to break up, my phone battery died. FML

by noboyfriend / 05/24/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, while teaching my kindergarten class, I had a feeling I was starting my period again. A boy in the class asked me what a period was. Stressing over my own, I briefly told him it's a woman's time of the month when they have mood swings. He was asking about the dot at the end of a sentence. FML

by anonymous / 04/09/2009 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML

by beachbum / 02/27/2009 at 1:03am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

by #201 / 02/05/2009 at 8:23am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I reached for my beer and took a huge swallow before I realized that I had picked up my friend's tobacco spit cup. "Vomit" is not a strong enough word to describe what happened next. FML

by blegh / 01/15/2009 at 11:57pm / Switzerland (Ticino) / Miscellaneous