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ispeakmamind

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ispeakmamind
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  • Number of visits : 242
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ispeakmamind's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying to convince a friend that even though I'm blonde, I'm not the oblivious or stupid moron everyone apparently thinks I am. Then I smacked face-first into a glass door. FML

#16057186
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23283) - you deserved it (26622)

On 05/05/2011 at 4:01pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, my mother told me she forgot what a verb is. I'm homeschooled, and she's my teacher. FML

#16052979
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35872) - you deserved it (4458)

On 05/05/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by asadwa -

Today, I brought my girlfriend of four months home for dinner to meet my parents. The first thing my mom says to her? "Oh my God, you're real!" FML

#16051471
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30414) - you deserved it (3431)

On 05/04/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Charlie (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to call the doctor to go and have them remove a tick that had got stuck to my man-parts while fishing. The receptionist laughed, she thought I was prank calling. FML

#16050622
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24774) - you deserved it (2869)

On 05/04/2011 at 10:38pm - health - by ouchies - United States

Today, I was getting funny looks all day. When I got home I realised that I was interrupted while doing my make-up this morning and completely forgot to fill in my second eye brow. FML

#16046636
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14365) - you deserved it (22960)

On 05/04/2011 at 5:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML

#16044464
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31788) - you deserved it (7947)

On 05/04/2011 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13710) - you deserved it (42395)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, when I came home from work, my computer was drenched with water. My sister claimed there was smoke coming out of it. FML

#15964444
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26716) - you deserved it (2302)

On 04/28/2011 at 3:29pm - misc - by Tokany (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I was watching a movie online. There was a 15 minute ad. 13 minutes into watching an ad about birth control, I noticed that there was a "skip this ad" button in the corner. FML

#15949369
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11295) - you deserved it (45562)

On 04/27/2011 at 2:33pm - misc - by popcorn - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42905) - you deserved it (4504)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I woke up to find a parking ticket on my car. My car was in my driveway and the cop who wrote it is my ex-boyfriend. This is the third time. FML

#15914349
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39481) - you deserved it (6026)

On 04/25/2011 at 12:24am - misc - by neverdatingacopagain (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

#15804993
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37541) - you deserved it (6174)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28712) - you deserved it (10136)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML

#15617038
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97984) - you deserved it (6728)

On 04/03/2011 at 4:06am - intimacy - by Now Single - Reserved

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30012) - you deserved it (41484)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)



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