insanemistress

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insanemistress

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 9 September 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 782
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About insanemistress : Im a nerd. And I'm 6" taller than Charles Manson.

insanemistress's page activity

Visits<b>gloriouskitty</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 10:38am<b>qlortin</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 9:14am<b>Hot_Wired</b> - the 12/15/2009 at 2:44am<b>ha</b> - the 12/14/2009 at 10:21pm<b>fudrick</b> - the 12/08/2009 at 6:35am<b>sodahhhr</b> - the 12/06/2009 at 5:50pm

insanemistress's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

insanemistress's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the shower sponge I've been using for a while now is the very same sponge my friends used to wipe up my vomit when I was drunk. I have been exfoliating a puked on sponge for more than a month. FML

by Delicious / 12/06/2009 at 2:28am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my very traditional grandmother has decided it's time for me to get married to Kevin. She's called half the town and informed them of the good news. I'm 17. I've never met Kevin. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2009 at 4:47am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I found out that me and my best friend are both pregnant. We live together, and both had one night stands with the same guy. Now we are going to be each raising his children in the same house while he has decided to "not get involved" and move to a different state. FML

by anonymous / 12/03/2009 at 1:55am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my husband stabbed me with his unusually long nasty toes nails in the leg while he slept. It took 3 stitches to fix it up, my husband and doctor laughed the entire time. He still refuses to cut them. FML

by ewww / 12/03/2009 at 12:59am / United States (Kentucky) / Health

Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year old man with a beer belly. FML

by fmlifetime / 10/24/2009 at 6:24pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a nice moment with my granddaughter as she was being affectionate by stroking my face. We were both quite content, until she said, "Aw, Grandma, your skin feels just like a crocodile." FML

by Granny / 10/24/2009 at 5:14pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Kids

Today, I went to McDonalds to get breakfast. I sat my food down at a table and went to get some napkins and a straw. I returned to the table to find that my food was gone, and could hear nothing but "SUCKKAAAA" trailing from the entrance to the restaurant. Some jerk stole my meal. FML

by HungryGirl / 10/24/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love