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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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indigoblues's favorite FMLs
by not as scarred as he should be / 10/18/2012 at 2:19pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went out for a few drinks with some friends. All night, I kept smiling and showing off my newly brace-free teeth. Later on, one of my friends drunkly asked, "Why does she keep smiling? Her teeth are fucking jacked." FML
by murp / 10/18/2012 at 12:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/18/2012 at 1:33am / United States / Animals
Today, I got a phone call from my 6-year-old son's school telling me they were concerned about him as he wouldn't stop barking at the radiator. After talking to my husband about it, I found out he's been teaching him so he could see the look on my face. FML
Today, I woke up and found a little note where my husband should have been. It said, "We've had some good times, hun, but it's time for me to move on." We've been married for 15 years, and have 3 children. FML
by AbandonedHouseWife / 10/17/2012 at 4:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 6:28am / United States (Virginia) / Kids
Today, my fiancé spent three hours arguing with his mom about how Scientology is a cult followed by simple-minded asshats; she shouted at him saying Xenu will come and fuck his shit up for not believing. This woman is going to be my children's grandmother. FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 3:54am / South Africa / Miscellaneous
Today, I told my daughter that she won't be going to her homecoming dance as punishment for her terrible grades. She's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in her room for hours. At this point, I don't know if I need to call a therapist or a vocal coach. FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, I was babysitting, and we were playing a game. Because he was little, I let him win all the games. He then turned to me and said, "You're really bad at this." I got very defensive and won the next game, and was actually proud that I beat a 3-year-old. FML
by amiliaroberts123 / 10/14/2012 at 8:45pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by Nickki / 10/14/2012 at 10:57am / United States / Kids
by stop it ninja / 10/14/2012 at 3:00am / United States (Virginia) / Animals
by notthebesttime / 10/13/2012 at 8:04am / Intimacy
Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML
by Anonymous / 10/13/2012 at 7:37am / United States / Kids
Today, I was babysitting four kids. I turned the TV on for them, and set the youngest on my lap. She started giggling and pointing at every single pimple I have, exclaiming "Boo-boo!" This went on for half an hour. FML
by Shiverice / 10/13/2012 at 7:22am / United States (Michigan) / Kids
by lalalalainie / 10/13/2012 at 2:45am / United States (California) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…
- Today, my high-strung and normally very proper mother took twice her prescribed dose of Ambien, and… Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers… Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating…