![[fr]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About indiecindyx : hayhay (:
I'm Jodie, & i happen to looove reading other people's failures. I couldn't tell you why.. i have enough of my own! xo
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29111) - you deserved it (3102)
On 05/14/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by IhateThem - United States
Today, my father who left my family over 10 years ago and never contacted us or paid child support, poked me on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47844) - you deserved it (2754)
On 03/05/2011 at 7:24pm - misc - by poked - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37530) - you deserved it (10101)
On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32999) - you deserved it (6769)
On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22214) - you deserved it (5244)
On 12/20/2010 at 9:31pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML
I agree, your life sucks (82992) - you deserved it (9946)
On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8785) - you deserved it (60926)
On 12/07/2010 at 1:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43367) - you deserved it (6090)
On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, while at work, I got a call. They left a voicemail. It was a 7 minute voicemail of the mattress squeaking and my mom screaming my dad's name. I am going to their house for supper tonight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24442) - you deserved it (1812)
On 11/13/2010 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Cantbreath94 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I discovered I am the "before picture" in an internet weight loss advert. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33282) - you deserved it (6075)
On 11/08/2010 at 4:11pm - misc - by beforegirl (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8588) - you deserved it (31612)
On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27605) - you deserved it (15702)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, I found a video of my girlfriend having sex with her male best friend on her computer. When I confronted her about it she said it was from before we met. In the video, she was wearing the engagement ring I bought her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45556) - you deserved it (2318)
On 09/27/2010 at 11:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26569) - you deserved it (28140)
On 09/17/2010 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30375) - you deserved it (7057)
On 07/30/2010 at 2:45am - intimacy - by hairless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
