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incognitogirl

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incognitogirl
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 December 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 252
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About incognitogirl : Description? Hmm I could say anything and you'd believe me. I'm a potato.
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See what I did there?

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incognitogirl's favorite FMLs

Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML

#20917232
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39699) - you deserved it (2607)

On 10/12/2013 at 2:19am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I discovered my 10 month old is terrified of my laugh. Every time I start to laugh, she screams in terror. It's getting depressing. FML

#20917208
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41362) - you deserved it (3364)

On 10/12/2013 at 1:40am - kids - by easily amused (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML

#20908563
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39800) - you deserved it (7287)

On 10/05/2013 at 4:23pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

#20907982
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19743) - you deserved it (45013)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up and saw that my alarm clock had fallen on the floor. It read 9:05 am. I panicked because I was late for work. As I frantically got ready, I went to pick my alarm clock up to place it back on my nightstand when I realized it was upside down. The actual time was 5:06. FML

#20879453
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36732) - you deserved it (6056)

On 09/13/2013 at 9:24am - misc - by NoorFML (woman) - United States

Today, one of my employees called in after his 8-hour shift, explaining that he had bed bugs at home, found one on his shirt, and thinks they are in the store. I own a mattress shop. They'd spread. FML

#20877588
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43320) - you deserved it (2239)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:12pm - work - by icanteven - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

#20875790
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40761) - you deserved it (6020)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by Grand Slam (man) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML

#20874059
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40123) - you deserved it (5126)

On 09/09/2013 at 2:42am - misc - by jessel_ladd92 (man) - United States

Today, after I explained to my waitress that I have an allergy to butter, she nonetheless put some on my baked potato. When I had her get me another, without butter, she came back with one and then asked if I would like butter with it. FML

#20862628
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42123) - you deserved it (2910)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML

#20848315
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42607) - you deserved it (20898)

On 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by me (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

Today, I asked out the girl who always looks and smiles at me in class. I was surprised when she rejected me until I found out she was actually always looking at the clock behind me, and smiling when class is almost over. FML

#20846650
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42928) - you deserved it (4249)

On 08/20/2013 at 5:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was showing a new girl around at school. As we were walking through the parking lot she noticed a green jeep and commented "I heard the person who drives that is a total creep. Is he?" I said I didn't know who it was. It was my car. FML

#20846340
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47142) - you deserved it (5428)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:40pm - misc - by mycar - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a kid in class dropped his paper on the floor. I held on to my desk with one hand and reached for the paper with my other hand. I lost balance and tilted both my chair and desk over, nailing the floor as everything on my desk hit the ground with me. He picked the paper up himself. FML

#20845667
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32372) - you deserved it (4452)

On 08/20/2013 at 12:01am - misc - by nice guys finish last - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

#20844435
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73583) - you deserved it (4054)

On 08/19/2013 at 9:06am - love - by Love stinks (man) - United States



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