Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

incognitogirl

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

incognitogirl

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 December 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 500
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About incognitogirl : Description? Hmm I could say anything and you'd believe me. I'm a potato.
.
.
.

See what I did there?

incognitogirl's page activity

Visits<b>jesse480</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 10:32pm<b>thestrangedude</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Dogfoodlid</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:24am<b>alison98hp</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 10:52am<b>ronak</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 1:07am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 7:28pm<b>Conn3ct</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 10:19am<b>RefrigeratorLord</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 3:00pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 12:00pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 3:08pm<b>LAUREN_1053</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 1:43am<b>truesarrif</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 11:39pm<b>jw90</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 2:25am<b>SuperPizzaMan</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 5:51pm<b>barnee26</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 3:05pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 6:30am<b>awkward611</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 5:10am<b>sniffenwessen</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 3:36am

incognitogirl's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of incognitogirl's badges

incognitogirl's favorite FMLs

Today, my laziness reached a whole new level when I caught myself skipping the longer FML stories to read the shorter ones. FML

#21272079
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29329) - you deserved it (11489)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by eh - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

#21271247
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38582) - you deserved it (2481)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:48pm - health - by Eww - United States (Oregon)

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

#21271187
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34509) - you deserved it (3441)

On 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML

#21268536
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37520) - you deserved it (7561)

On 09/30/2014 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32020) - you deserved it (3544)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I have learned a lot of "big" words from reading so much, but can actually only pronounce about half of them correctly. FML

#21264917
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25682) - you deserved it (5786)

On 09/25/2014 at 1:48am - misc - by anon (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had to inform my roommate that dry shampoo, deodorant, and perfume are not the same as a shower. It's been two weeks. FML

#21263853
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35305) - you deserved it (2462)

On 09/23/2014 at 2:30pm - health - by catgiraffegirl (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend couldn't go on a date with me because his mom said no. He's 23. FML

#21263362
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (288) - you deserved it (4219)

On 09/22/2014 at 8:23pm - love - by Serire (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I heard what sounded like high-pitched feminine moaning coming from my son's room. I knocked and walked in, expecting to catch him red handed with a girl. He'd just beaten his high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21262395
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (328) - you deserved it (7865)

On 09/21/2014 at 11:33am - intimacy - by royallymessedup - United Kingdom

Today, I had to stop at a gas station to go to the bathroom. A sign on the door told people to knock since the door didn't lock. As I was peeing, a lady walked in on me. Rather than simply saying sorry and shutting the damn door, she opened it wider and stepped in to apologize. FML

#21262000
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34205) - you deserved it (2391)

On 09/20/2014 at 7:39pm - misc - by rabid_otaku - United States (Illinois)

Today, while giving directions to a blind guy, I accidentally made him walk into a wall. FML

#21261532
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32388) - you deserved it (7671)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:14pm - misc - by camerashyguy - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a blind date. My date would respond to me by saying "retweet" and "favorite" when she thought something was relatable. FML

#21261017
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40232) - you deserved it (3510)

On 09/18/2014 at 11:15pm - love - by clairebear104 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41019) - you deserved it (4327)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the only girl who's ever called me cute or handsome is actually a compulsive liar. FML

#21260295
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33071) - you deserved it (2506)

On 09/17/2014 at 9:37pm - misc - by compulsiveliarssaytheylikeme - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a conversation with a girl I don't normally talk to. She ended up saying I'm "not as annoying as everyone says." and "Oh... you didn't know?" FML

#21259544
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31555) - you deserved it (2785)

On 09/16/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cornwall)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: