imnotbatman

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imnotbatman

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1283
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About imnotbatman : Hey :D I want to put something witty in this box, but I can't think of anything.

Uhm, Im socially awkward and I love mashed potatoes :D

imnotbatman's page activity

Visits<b>LovesSushi</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 12:36pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 5:35am

imnotbatman's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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imnotbatman's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML

by Eliza / 04/03/2012 at 11:40pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to McDonalds and ordered a happy meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2012 at 1:48pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I repeatedly screamed so loudly and with such emotion at a video game, that my neighbours thought I was in trouble and called the police. FML

by thatscreamerguy / 04/03/2012 at 7:11am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML

by JeffeeBojangles / 02/28/2012 at 7:46am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I had to tell my mom to stop sending pictures of Jesus to my boyfriend. FML

by Anon / 02/11/2012 at 10:01pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML

by randomgirl / 01/07/2012 at 9:12am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

by blegh / 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend told me that I can no longer sleep over at his house because his cat doesn't like it. FML

by kaipodable / 12/21/2011 at 8:41pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

by Username / 12/15/2011 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I went out in a storm to collect my wheelie bin, which had flown down the street. On the way back to my house, I realised my door had slammed shut and locked behind me. That's okay though, a trampoline decided to smash my window and let me in. FML

by mattdevil / 12/08/2011 at 1:57pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

by areyouserial / 12/05/2011 at 8:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

by haunted / 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML

by yuck / 11/15/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom (Bolton) / Animals