Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

iluvwaffles42

Search for a member

iluvwaffles42

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1005
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About iluvwaffles42 : My name's Jesus. You can call me Jesus or Jesus (wutever floats your boat):D . I love waffles especially the Belgian kind with vanilla(; . I'm also a ninja but that's supposed to be a secret>;). Ketchup=yum but pickles are gross and mustard, relish and mayonnaise are too xP. I had a pet rock named Eduaro but he ran away:,( so I don't have any pets anymore. Also, please don't stalk me. It's a little creepy-.-. Messages will be ignored.(i only use the mobile app):D but other than that, I'm a pretty chill dude and I can be funny at times.

iluvwaffles42's page activity

Visits<b>JoonBee</b> - the 09/01/2011 at 4:32pm

iluvwaffles42's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

iluvwaffles42's favorite FMLs

Today, I was writing my rough draft of an essay, and I forgot how to spell a word. I waited for auto correct to help. I was writing on paper. FML

#19144925
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10979) - you deserved it (39452)

On 02/23/2012 at 8:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

#19130391
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26479) - you deserved it (8287)

On 02/21/2012 at 10:33am - health - by mary (woman) - Australia

Today, my car key clicker wouldn't let me in. After a few frustrating minutes, I realized that, besides electronic capabilities, it's also an actual key that fits in a hole to unlock my door. FML

#19119927
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6287) - you deserved it (36488)

On 02/20/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I met my brother for the first time in 20 years. Everything was going great, until he tried to make out with me. FML

#19094213
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43375) - you deserved it (2838)

On 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I fought back with words against a bully. He cried, and I got detention. FML

#19085871
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35921) - you deserved it (2563)

On 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm - misc - by sharpie2792 - United States

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

#19004597
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20682) - you deserved it (5691)

On 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm - health - by MahSquito (man) - United States

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42174) - you deserved it (9151)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML

#18982251
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29141) - you deserved it (3852)

On 02/03/2012 at 2:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

#18981474
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15241) - you deserved it (21925)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17303) - you deserved it (21853)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
217 comments

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

#18973351
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35226) - you deserved it (3420)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm - money - by zobara - Switzerland

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML

#18972343
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19997) - you deserved it (8776)

On 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by pmony - United States (New York)

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

#18968105
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35089) - you deserved it (3245)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:11am - work - by ABBenzin (man) - United States

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

#18967800
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55185) - you deserved it (4241)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: