iheartjustinsane

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iheartjustinsane

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 August 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5722
  • Number of comments : 166
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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iheartjustinsane's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 7:27am<b>ahmadmuneer</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 5:09pm<b>Ilikepie82479</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:19am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:54am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:30pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:31am<b>jchansfan</b> - the 07/15/2010 at 6:08am<b>snoosnoo</b> - the 04/08/2010 at 3:35pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/24/2009 at 11:38pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 11/24/2009 at 2:38pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 11/23/2009 at 10:20am<b>machete</b> - the 09/26/2009 at 12:10pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 1:27pm

iheartjustinsane's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

iheartjustinsane's favorite FMLs

Today, my looks alone made a girl cry. FML

by SadFace / 03/07/2010 at 1:54pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I met at a masquerade. The moment he saw me without my mask on, he left the date. FML

by workinggirl / 03/07/2010 at 12:38pm / United States (Montana) / Love

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

by bathroomblunder / 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. She pulls out a freezer bag full of condoms and says "I have some cooler ones upstairs, if you want his penis to glow in the dark." FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML

by ThoroughlyCreepedOut / 03/06/2010 at 7:22pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally downloaded a virus, which hijacked my email program. I somehow doubt the Dean at my university will thank me for my suggestion that he too could experience 100% natural male enhancement pills. FML

by smarie09 / 03/06/2010 at 5:44pm / Canada (Alberta) / Geek

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend in her room. That means: Jonas Brothers posters on the wall, Jonas Brothers pillows, sheets, comforter and stuffed dog. After we did it, she apologized to her posters for having to see that, since they're pure. FML

by ICantBelieveThis / 03/06/2010 at 9:31am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

by artsmart1 / 03/05/2010 at 7:40pm / United States / Health

Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2010 at 7:54am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML

by Catois / 03/05/2010 at 12:17am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, a guy commented on a picture of my boyfriend and I kissing on facebook, and said to please stop 'testing' him. He also messaged me saying how he wishes he could get a girlfriend like me, that I'm gorgeous, and that he wants to go out with me. I'm his cousin. FML

by Brandee / 03/04/2010 at 8:39pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Love

Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML

by GoDiarrhea / 03/04/2010 at 1:52pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Health

Today, I stole a bite of my boyfriend's hamburger. He threw a fit, saying I took too big a bite and I had to replace it with a new, more expensive one. Afterwards, he said how lucky I was he didn't break up with me then and there. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2010 at 12:15pm / Estonia (Harjumaa) / Love

Today, I realised that my staff doesn't take me seriously. I walked in on my chef, who had just spent an hour and half a block of cheese carving cheddar goggles for himself. When I confronted him, he pulled up his t-shirt to reveal a cocktail sausage taped to his stomach. FML

by Garry / 03/04/2010 at 7:43am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Work

Today, we were working with infant and adult CPR dummies. After practising flawless CPR on the adult dummy, I announced "And that's how you save someone." Then I tripped on the baby dummy and fell. My co-worker stood up and yelled out, "And that's how you kill a baby." FML

by DUMMIE / 03/03/2010 at 7:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous