About icyfire617 : I'm not a bird
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18878) - you deserved it (11180)
On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22739) - you deserved it (1976)
On 10/30/2011 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was in a rush and had to get changed in a train restroom. While changing, I leaned against the button that opened the door. Not only do train toilet doors open and close very slowly, leaving you half naked for a few seconds, but everyone in the carriage opposite can see clearly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15618) - you deserved it (2529)
On 10/27/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by omgomgomg (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24592) - you deserved it (3629)
On 10/26/2011 at 1:43am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17539) - you deserved it (12010) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14364) - you deserved it (26869)
On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15330) - you deserved it (27723)
On 10/18/2011 at 2:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44375) - you deserved it (3642)
Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36765) - you deserved it (2614)
On 10/17/2011 at 1:44am - intimacy - by pokeballbra - United States (Texas)
Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26007) - you deserved it (6935)
On 10/13/2011 at 3:19am - intimacy - by scewable (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9016) - you deserved it (29832)
On 10/12/2011 at 8:37am - kids - by John W. (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25683) - you deserved it (2566)
On 10/02/2011 at 2:36am - misc - by Emmy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, after being in the UK for 2 months, I learned that when saying, "I'm about to blow off and kill someone", to the British "blow off" means "fart." This was pointed out to me in an open-space office after a particularly loud rant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7180) - you deserved it (13166)
On 09/29/2011 at 4:04am - work - by AngerManagement - United Kingdom
Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31338) - you deserved it (1674)
On 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out the reason why my therapist was so nice to me all of the time. Apparently, she is afraid that I'm going to stab her if she pisses me off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18960) - you deserved it (3892)
On 09/27/2011 at 1:14am - health - by Josh - United States (Missouri)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
