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Today, I had a science test. A question asked, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-hearted, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, and gave me detention for insulting her intelligence. FML
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On 09/22/2011 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the new office IT guy figured the best way to get the virus off my computer was to wipe my entire hard drive. He was kind enough to back my data up and restore everything from the backups. Including the virus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20539) - you deserved it (1617)
On 09/22/2011 at 8:06am - work - by Soopa-Genius (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML
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Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML
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On 09/22/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by mortenp - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was feeling unusually self-confident, so I decided to skip putting on makeup for the day. On my way to class, I passed some guys selling towels. One of them jeered, "Wanna be prettier? Buy a towel, and throw it over your face!" There goes my self-confidence. FML
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On 09/21/2011 at 11:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML
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On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my younger brother decided it would be funny to put rubbing alcohol in my contact lens case while I had them soaking overnight. I didn't realize this until I put the first one in. FML
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On 09/19/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by redeye (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my new roommate moved in. It seems that instead of using toilet paper like a normal human being, she instead opts to use the nearest towel in reach. I found this out when I went to dry off with mine after a shower. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26422) - you deserved it (1274)
On 09/15/2011 at 3:43pm - misc - by poop towel - United States (Maryland)
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
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On 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm - kids - by unknown - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out that my parents used all of the college money I have been saving up for 8 years to buy a beach house. The reason they waited until now to tell me? A tree fell on it, and they need more money for repairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30081) - you deserved it (1719)
On 09/12/2011 at 3:36am - money - by Me - United States
Today, I had the most exciting dream of my life. I was dreaming about catching a shiny charmander. I'm 15, and instead of dreaming of girls, I'm dreaming of Pokémon. FML
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On 06/29/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by wispywee - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after hanging up the phone, I realised that telemarketers are my only form of social life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16996) - you deserved it (4367)
On 02/07/2011 at 3:38am - misc - by oxbonxo (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my dad was completely engrossed in a football game on TV, so, trying to be cute and funny, my mom flashed him. He didn't notice, but I did. FML
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On 11/25/2010 at 1:33pm - misc - by blenderbookf (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I realized that 95% of my facebook friends added me only because they think my sisters are hot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23473) - you deserved it (3074)
On 11/23/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by smallfrie32 -
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of my dad constantly hitting on her. Not because she was disgusted, but because she wants to date him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42550) - you deserved it (1826)
On 01/26/2010 at 2:35am - love - by Junior (man) - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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