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iced_diamonds

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iced_diamonds
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  • Number of visits : 77
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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iced_diamonds's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

#16477855
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29590) - you deserved it (3873)

On 06/03/2011 at 12:47am - work - by whymyliferose - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

#15883377
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73131) - you deserved it (5503)

On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -

Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML

#15852262
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43509) - you deserved it (6376)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids broke down the door and pelted me with eggs. FML

#15846054
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43466) - you deserved it (5464)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML

#15676274
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41054) - you deserved it (3501)

On 04/07/2011 at 3:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

#15619603
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70053) - you deserved it (5707)

On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

#14029442
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33578) - you deserved it (4358)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm - kids - by Laura -

Today, I came home to find that my pregnant cat had given birth to a stillborn kitten in every room of the house. It had then rubbed its butt around the house, leaving bloody stains everywhere. When I went to clean the white carpet, the bleach turned it green. FML

#13365582
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30531) - you deserved it (4808)

On 10/08/2010 at 12:33pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my new step-dad proposed to my mom during a family trip to Wal-Mart. FML

#11251365
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32843) - you deserved it (3487)

On 06/16/2010 at 10:22pm - misc - by Blank (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML

#7293990
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23841) - you deserved it (7841)

On 01/12/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by cold-n-stinky (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I received a 4 page letter in the post from a woman telling me she was Alan's wife. She spoke about their wedding in 2004, their two beautiful kids who love their daddy very much (she included pictures), and how much she loves him. Alan is my husband of 7 years. FML

#6683091
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42809) - you deserved it (2259)

On 12/09/2009 at 6:47pm - love - by _RobotInDisguise (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I found out that the person sending me secret love letters was actually my dad, who felt sorry for me. FML

#6564625
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39828) - you deserved it (2436)

On 12/02/2009 at 3:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, after months of trying to potty train my son, he finally told me he used the potty. I went to the bathroom to check. There was nothing there. So I asked him "Where did you go to the potty?". He then grabbed my hand and took me to the cat's litter box. My son has successfully litter trained himself. FML

#6321583
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24628) - you deserved it (2686)

On 11/16/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Japan (Okinawa)

Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML

#6040097
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9551) - you deserved it (74499)

On 10/28/2009 at 2:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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