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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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iYakusoku

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iYakusoku
  • Town/Country : New Zealand
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 310
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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iYakusoku's favorite FMLs

Today, my entire extended family was over for Christmas. I opened a gift to see that it was a fruitcake and saw everyone looking at me, smiling. This is their way to tell me that they know I'm gay and that they accept me. I'm straight. FML

#6940089 (90)

I agree, your life sucks (24043) - you deserved it (2330)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:34pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML

#6933865 (66)

I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (1400)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:25am - misc - by sucks_brah (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I sat for 3 hours at my boyfriend's Christmas celebrations. He has 22 cousins. They open presents one at a time. In silence. I got nothing. FML

#6933166 (64)

I agree, your life sucks (21518) - you deserved it (1877)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:28am - love - by Earths_Venus (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was playing ball with my student during recess. My first attempt at throwing the ball hit him in the head. My second attempt hit him in the crotch. FML

#6211004 (58)

I agree, your life sucks (17193) - you deserved it (5333)

On 11/08/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a petting zoo with my niece and nephew. While we were checking out the llamas, one of them spit directly into my face. Disgusted and embarrassed, we turned away to pet a deer. The deer immediately urinated then shook its tail which splattered it into my face. FML

#6202329 (49)

I agree, your life sucks (21536) - you deserved it (1902)

On 11/07/2009 at 9:13pm - misc - by shando - United States (Nevada)

Today, after a trip to my doctor I found out that my recent mood swings and hot flashes are the result of a hormonal imbalance that mimics the effects of menopause. I'm a 17 year old guy. FML

#6200798 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (26900) - you deserved it (1200)

On 11/07/2009 at 7:38pm - health - by oldlady (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while walking to work, I accidentally dropped my $400 cell phone on the sidewalk. The screen shattered into a million pieces. A woman passing by looked at the ruined phone and said, "Now that's what you call a dropped call!" She laughed and kept walking. FML

#6154190 (251)

I agree, your life sucks (25358) - you deserved it (12095)

On 11/04/2009 at 5:37pm - misc - by Cellismasher (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the McDonalds drive-thru getting my morning coffee, when some guy slammed into the back of my car. I'm so happy I was holding the cup between my legs at that very moment, because now I have 2nd degree burns on my lady parts. FML

#6151302 (172)

I agree, your life sucks (28990) - you deserved it (5082)

On 11/04/2009 at 2:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I realized that acne is a major side effect of a medication I'm taking. The medication is to help me with my anxiety. The acne is creating more anxiety. And the more anxious I get, the more meds I need. And the more my face breaks out. FML

#5861611 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (27913) - you deserved it (3313)

On 10/17/2009 at 2:26am - health - by JoJo - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out that if you let your son install a new shower head, he won't tighten it properly. So when you turn the shower on, it will shoot out at rocket speed, hitting you in the face. Then when you grab the shower handle to prevent yourself falling backwards, you will just rip that out and hit your head again. FML

#5858229 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (23685) - you deserved it (3253)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:38pm - misc - by Ndanick1193 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it is my wedding day. I couldn't find my very expensive wedding dress anywhere. After almost 2 hours of panic and chaos, I found it in my pool, covered in red paint, with a note on one of my lounge chairs reading, "Today is MY wedding day, bitch." FML

#5354968 (255)

I agree, your life sucks (57871) - you deserved it (2530)

On 09/19/2009 at 5:04pm - misc - by weddingcrashed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML

#5344643 (255)

I agree, your life sucks (56725) - you deserved it (2967)

On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was driving through a neighborhood and saw a "slow down, children" sign. I was nice and slowed down as I passed a couple little kids with their parents outside watching them. I guess I was going too slow because one of the fathers started chasing me down the street calling me a pedophile. FML

#5340344 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (32482) - you deserved it (2621)

On 09/18/2009 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard my dad screaming in the hallway. Thinking he was having a heart attack I ran to the hall without looking where I was going. I slipped and slid towards my dad in what turned out to be a mass quantity of diarrhea from one of my two dogs. He was screaming because he stepped in it. FML

#5330246 (99)

I agree, your life sucks (27832) - you deserved it (2566)

On 09/18/2009 at 10:27am - animals - by poopEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I urgently needed to use the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. When I went to flush, it would not go down the pipes. After about ten panic filled minutes, I notice the cat litter box. I carefully scoop out my logs, and bury them in the cat litter. FML

#5325654 (250)

I agree, your life sucks (13004) - you deserved it (32425)

On 09/18/2009 at 12:29am - animals - by Poowee (woman) - United States (Alabama)