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iNinjaAri

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iNinjaAri

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  • Number of visits : 808
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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iNinjaAri's page activity

Visits<b>sCrEaMiNgToAsT</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 6:05am

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iNinjaAri's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

#19305380
7 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18290) - you deserved it (12725)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML

#19301577
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27427) - you deserved it (2605)

On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25563) - you deserved it (6763)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML

#19204484
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8153) - you deserved it (27348)

On 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by argh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

#19059341
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36848) - you deserved it (2701)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I had to tell my mom to stop sending pictures of Jesus to my boyfriend. FML

#19052034
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29832) - you deserved it (2906)

On 02/11/2012 at 10:01pm - love - by Anon - United States (Arizona)

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8751) - you deserved it (66114)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27383) - you deserved it (8694) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML

#18734147
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29403) - you deserved it (13039)

On 01/07/2012 at 9:12am - misc - by randomgirl - United Kingdom (London)

Today, at work, I slipped and fell on my backside. The creepy security guard offered to 'kiss it better.' FML

#18724362
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27841) - you deserved it (2929)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by only 10 more hours to go (woman) - United States

Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML

#18722642
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27806) - you deserved it (5584)

On 01/06/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by plantfood - United States

Today, I was on Skype with the guy I like. After a while of being on Facebook I forgot I was on webcam to him and started picking my nose. He ended the call. FML

#18716457
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13975) - you deserved it (50387)

On 01/05/2012 at 2:35pm - love - by louise (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33170) - you deserved it (9185)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33402) - you deserved it (5702)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was having a rough day and decided to go out for a walk at 1 a.m. to clear my head. I ended up being driven home by two cops, who thought I was prostituting myself at the truck stop. When we arrived, they had a nice conversation with my parents. FML

#18424954
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29535) - you deserved it (4982)

On 12/04/2011 at 2:46am - misc - by D (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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