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iMeowzAlot

Offline (15 hours ago) | Search for a member

iMeowzAlot

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 177
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About iMeowzAlot : I have no idea... Hi... I'm a cat that can type English don't ask how I just can. I also happen to know that the answer to the ultimate question of life the universe and everything is... 42. Yeah... And yes I can meow. Meow. The cat in my pic. is stare cat/ graphics cat. He is a good cat. Well bye now I'm off to do cat things.

iMeowzAlot's page activity

Visits<b>ThoranSlock</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 1:30pm<b>adrianramz69</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 1:52pm<b>Thursday737</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 7:45pm<b>ygdrassil</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 4:00pm

iMeowzAlot's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of iMeowzAlot's badges

iMeowzAlot's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

#21446710
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29033) - you deserved it (4804)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by strangely - United States (California)

Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML

#21446581
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27067) - you deserved it (2757)

On 07/24/2015 at 2:54pm - misc - by HAIL SITHIS (woman) - United States

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

#21443212
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12499) - you deserved it (37896)

On 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

#21442690
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32557) - you deserved it (4583)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm - kids - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML

#21420087
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36825) - you deserved it (2562)

On 06/03/2015 at 3:22am - intimacy - by W T F (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML

#21397872
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30867) - you deserved it (5581)

On 04/22/2015 at 9:39am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was asked to prom by the same guy who "accidentally" cut off a chunk of my hair in class and with whom I haven't had a conversation in my life. When I politely declined he said, "You'll regret this". FML

#21392030
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30747) - you deserved it (2313)

On 04/11/2015 at 9:53pm - misc - by scared4myhair - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked my 5-year-old son how school went today. He sighed and said "Fuck off, dad." I thought kids only became such colossal douchebags in their teens. FML

#21387117
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30551) - you deserved it (6090)

On 04/03/2015 at 5:15pm - kids - by no, YOU raised him (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I found out there's a support page on Facebook for people who have been "hurt" by me. FML

#21384648
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16854) - you deserved it (31164)

On 03/31/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by SupportPage - United States (California)

Today, feeling in need of a self-esteem boost, I took what I thought was a good selfie and I put it on Facebook. Out of 500 friends, the only response I got was a picture of Saddam Hussein with the caption, "This is why I bomb people." FML

#21370942
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29411) - you deserved it (7311)

On 03/09/2015 at 2:01am - misc - by why they bomb - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

#21367918
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24520) - you deserved it (34645)

On 03/04/2015 at 10:03am - health - by actually just constipated.. and stupid - Tunisia

Today, apparently when you tell a hairdresser "A little off the sides." they hear "A bowl cut, please, and make it look extra stupid." FML

#21354162
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32674) - you deserved it (3384)

On 02/11/2015 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, I was talking to my friend in Spanish because he understands it better than English. We were in the middle of a discussion about a TV show when some guy from our school ran up, spat on my shoes and screamed, "I SPEAK SPANISH, STOP TALKING ABOUT ME!" and ran away. FML

Today, I was in a heated debate about climate change. I got so flustered that I forgot the word "volcano" and ended up calling them "exploding mountain things". End of the debate. Shame. FML

#21347486
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27144) - you deserved it (6566)

On 01/31/2015 at 9:29pm - misc - by WalkTheOtherWay - Canada (Ontario)



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