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iLakers

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 670
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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iLakers's page activity

Visits<b>Jacob_Stoops</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 6:19pm<b>mrahhhhh</b> - the 09/01/2011 at 2:58am

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iLakers's favorite FMLs

Today, I sent a forward to everyone in my phonebook saying, "HOUSE PARTY-NO PARENTS, LOTS OF ALCOHOL, MAYBE A CHANCE TO HOOK UP." I then got a reply from my mom saying, "I'm probably the only one that would show up." Even my mom thinks I'm a loser, and I'm now grounded for 3 weeks. FML

#4052312
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9504) - you deserved it (80134)

On 07/26/2009 at 11:25am - misc - by racchhh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I received a "diamond ring" in Mafia Wars (a facebook app) from my boyfriend of 3 years. Along with the ring came a message. It read, "Will you marry me?" He was serious. FML

#3827229
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55018) - you deserved it (9143)

On 07/17/2009 at 8:56am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my wife gave me back my camera which she took on vacation to visit her parents with our 2-year old. I noticed the picture sequence had big gaps in the numbering. I ran an undelete on the card, and found 80+ pictures of her naked with another guy in her mom's bedroom. FML

#3792104
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91327) - you deserved it (4661)

On 07/16/2009 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44912) - you deserved it (26762)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML

Today, I thought I'd finally make a step towards getting over my ex-fiancé by flirting with a cute waiter. I left him a note on the bill. He comes back, says "which one of you is [name]?" and leans down close to me to say, "Thanks for your note, but your card was declined." FML

#2203706
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46648) - you deserved it (7329)

On 05/23/2009 at 2:43am - love - by Mel (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend took me to his grandfather's funeral. At the reception, his family members insist on hearing me play piano. After getting positive reactions, I dive into one of my favorites, Rustle of Spring. In 2 seconds everyone bursts into tears. That was Papa's favorite too. FML

#1768165
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52960) - you deserved it (4027)

On 05/09/2009 at 12:54am - misc - by pianokiller (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while working as a makeup artist in the mall, I was approached by a man who wanted to try lipstick (not unusual we do a lot of drag). While I'm applying it he starts to make gross noises and after a quick glance I realize he has a massive erection. He then whispers mmmm don't stop now. FML

#1745966
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74989) - you deserved it (3905)

On 05/08/2009 at 10:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was driving to the grocery store with my 7 year-old son. When I was approaching a stop sign, I look next to me and see a guy with a triangle shaped head. I tell my son "Look at the guy with the triangle head." My window was open. So was his. FML

#1587848
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7864) - you deserved it (65448)

On 05/03/2009 at 9:44am - misc - by mylifesucks123 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my car got a flat tire. I jacked up my car, removed the flat and went to get my spare out of the trunk. Where my spare is supposed to be I found a note. It said "You're a bitch - John". John is my ex boyfriend. He borrowed my car the day we broke up, apparently he stole my spare tire too. FML

#1039565
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50508) - you deserved it (9005)

On 04/16/2009 at 10:38pm - love - by jacked (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my ten year old son realized something. Beer is alcohol. People who drink a lot of alcohol are alcoholics. Therefore I am an alcoholic for drinking beer with dinner. He told everyone at his conservative private school and they tried to have an intervention. They pray for me every day. FML

#921168
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61810) - you deserved it (11340)

On 04/12/2009 at 12:44am - kids - by cxcrktkt (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was walking into CVS, two older men outside said to me "Young lady, please consider us on your way out." Thinking they were hitting on me, I rolled my eyes and said "Screw you." When I walked back outside, I realized they were asking for AIDS donations. FML

#912798
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8455) - you deserved it (78132)

On 04/11/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I don't know very well. He told me to dress in formal attire so I assumed he was taking me to a nice dinner. He took me to his brothers wedding, and introduced me as "the one" to his entire family. FML

#720830
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (104251) - you deserved it (7011)

On 03/31/2009 at 6:44am - love - by lizzardbreath (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

#644123
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82452) - you deserved it (16329)

On 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by badmom (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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