iLakers

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iLakers

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1134
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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iLakers's page activity

Visits<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 11:35pm<b>Jacob_Stoops</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 6:19pm<b>mrahhhhh</b> - the 09/01/2011 at 2:58am

iLakers's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

iLakers's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to endure yet another evening of the old man in the apartment above me screaming, "No, I don't want to shave my nose hair, you crazy bitch." He lives alone. FML

by hurtsmyears / 11/06/2011 at 8:23pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was over at a friend's house for a party. I was trying to strike up a conversation with one of my cute guy friends, so I showed him this funny picture of me that my friend took. His reply was "Hahahaa those Fatbooth pictures are hilarious!" It wasn't a Fatbooth picture. FML

by sophhiee / 11/05/2011 at 7:45am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2011 at 3:29am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm / United States / Kids

Today, I completed the arduous, nearly hour-long process of answering the eHarmony dating questionnaire, only to be told my answers were too "unique" for them to match me with anyone. I had chosen "the world" as my distance range. FML

by DrakeScott / 11/02/2011 at 2:14pm / United States (Maine) / Love

Today, I caught my best friend in bed with my current boyfriend. Apparently watching movies naked is "the new in thing". FML

by backstabbed / 10/29/2011 at 3:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, while jogging in the park, I saw a man acting strange and trying to talk to 3 little girls. I jogged over to their mother and warned her about a 'weirdo' lurking around her daughters. Turns out that 'weirdo' is the woman's disabled brother. FML

by cristina_laila / 10/15/2011 at 9:13pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonalds, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

by Bigpoppa0507 / 08/31/2011 at 10:02am / Canada / Health

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

by / 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm / United States / Health

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

by aarone23 / 06/01/2011 at 9:30am / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation