Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

honeycutt8729

Search for a member

honeycutt8729

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3702
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About honeycutt8729 : I'm Kristin & I love rap!!
I read fml because I love to laugh.
I don't care about grammar.
I love working out.
Always in a good mood.
I have a black lab who likes to wrestle, and cheats by head butting me in the leg when I'm cooking.
I'm married...7-1-11
I love to cook.

honeycutt8729's page activity

Visits<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 9:41pm<b>ZackFev</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 2:23pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:29pm<b>euphoricness</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:57pm<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 12:15am<b>iamataco</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 1:08am<b>Heatherx1243</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 10:00pm<b>elsie96</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 4:32pm<b>H3AD8HOT</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 10:53pm<b>Willski</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 3:00pm<b>Sabrewulf</b> - the 04/14/2012 at 9:02pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 04/14/2012 at 4:42am

honeycutt8729's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

honeycutt8729's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a grocery store with my great-grandmother. It would've been nice to know she hadn't taken her medication before she started beating the cashier with her umbrella. FML

#19098452
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21049) - you deserved it (1869)

On 02/17/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

#19095316
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27071) - you deserved it (5046)

On 02/16/2012 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by dummy - United States

Today, I dropped my bag to run after my two year old who had bolted in the parking lot. Once he was in his seat, I got in and drove away. I felt two large thumps as I drove over my own iPad, cellphone and wallet. FML

#19093347
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27588) - you deserved it (13247)

On 02/16/2012 at 1:36pm - kids - by ray - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after recently moving to an apartment, we've already been asked if we wanted to buy drugs, had a children's chair thrown through the front window, our door painted with "CUNT LICKER" and my laundry stolen. FML

#19092499
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30436) - you deserved it (3430)

On 02/16/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Jeathrow - United States (California)

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

#19091480
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19957) - you deserved it (4117)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:43am - animals - by parkertownparadise (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML

#19090033
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26141) - you deserved it (2481)

On 02/15/2012 at 10:59pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML

#19088946
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15775) - you deserved it (29135)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was leaving for work, I discovered my neighbor had just passed away. I found out when I came across his body lying in my front yard. FML

#19087811
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30673) - you deserved it (1801)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:53pm - misc - by Jedi2500 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my hands on some meet and greet passes for a concert. My fiancé and I got our picture taken with the band. A few moments later, in my excitement, instead of texting the picture to my friend, I accidentally deleted it. FML

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

#19085877
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28248) - you deserved it (2353)

On 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I fought back with words against a bully. He cried, and I got detention. FML

#19085871
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34803) - you deserved it (2485)

On 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm - misc - by sharpie2792 - United States

Today, I decided to quit smoking. My wife conveniently decided on the same day that she was going to start smoking. FML

#19085409
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25922) - you deserved it (2883)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:50pm - health - by TerribleAddiction - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

#19085397
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26398) - you deserved it (1956)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by jess (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I wanted to freshen up my room, so I bought some Febreze. Standing on my bed, I began to spray, not noticing that the air vent directly across was turned on. The spray came directly back at me. The doctor says that the irritation in my eyes may last for several days. FML

#19084596
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10313) - you deserved it (21215)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:18am - health - by prettysmellingbedroom - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: