honeycutt8729

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Offline (the 04/04/2016 at 10:58pm)

honeycutt8729

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honeycutt8729
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 May 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5373
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About honeycutt8729 : I'm Kristin.
I read fml because I love to laugh.
I love working out.
Always in a good mood.
I love to cook.
I love the correct use of grammar and punctuation.
I have the perfect life with a supportive fiancé who cares about my happiness.

honeycutt8729's page activity

Visits<b>tiitsmcgee</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 11:58am<b>pred8885</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:23am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:16am<b>felicianchris</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 11:27pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 9:23pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 9:21pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 3:18am<b>freeport_aidan</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 6:23am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:54pm<b>Rich531</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 7:07pm<b>siuolwt</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 4:13am<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 12:54pm<b>tfowl61692</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 6:28pm<b>Augenna</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:52am<b>mrowl96</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 2:52pm<b>Yadiloh52</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 2:14pm<b>jozephizcoolz</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 1:43pm<b>Jpav1</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 1:25pm

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honeycutt8729's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the gnat infestation in my dorm room was not caused by the recent cool weather, but rather the rotten pear I found under my roommates bed. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 1:12pm / United States / Work

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for the first time. I cracked a joke that offended her, so she gave me the silent treatment. I had to pee, and since she wouldn't tell me where the bathroom was, I went to look for it. I walked in on her parents making love. FML

by banned / 03/09/2012 at 1:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML

by babymine / 03/08/2012 at 11:45pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2012 at 1:29am / United States / Health

Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML

by sdk2010 / 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML

by sdk2010 / 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, due to the powerful antibiotic I was taking for a bad infection on my knee, I had no control over my bowels and shat my pants while discussing a plumbing problem in a customers basement. FML

by beernuts / 03/06/2012 at 6:53am / United States / Health

Today, due to the powerful antibiotic I was taking for a bad infection on my knee, I had no control over my bowels and shat my pants while discussing a plumbing problem in a customers basement. FML

by beernuts / 03/06/2012 at 6:53am / United States / Health

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

by Kayla / 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm / United States / Health

Today, my friend and I walked 3 miles to a Starbucks. We went inside, paid for our coffees and walked the 3 miles back to my house. We forgot to pick up our coffees. FML

by stuff2710 / 03/04/2012 at 7:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, I sneezed while at the office. I felt snot shoot out, but I couldn't see anything on the tissue. I ignored it and went on with my day. When I went to the bathroom hours later, I noticed a huge wad of snot had dried onto the front of my shirt. No one told me about it. FML

by breebree-0 / 03/04/2012 at 2:36pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was having a pleasant jog, that is until I was struck by the terrible feeling of an oncoming turd. Being only about 20 minutes from home, I thought I could make it back without letting the beast out. I was so wrong. The only thing I'm grateful for is that I was carrying the Sunday paper. FML

by fingerhut / 03/03/2012 at 3:27am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2012 at 10:05pm / United States / Love

Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML

by argh / 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML

by kal / 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous