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honeycutt8729

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honeycutt8729
  • Town/Country : Flea Hop, Alabama
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 3084
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About honeycutt8729 : I'm Kristin & I love rap!!
I read fml because I love to laugh.
I don't care about grammar.
I love working out.
Always in a good mood.
I have a black lab who likes to wrestle, and cheats by head butting me in the leg when I'm cooking.
I'm married...7-1-11
I love to cook.

honeycutt8729's last visitors

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honeycutt8729's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

honeycutt8729's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the gnat infestation in my dorm room was not caused by the recent cool weather, but rather the rotten pear I found under my roommates bed. FML

#19245415
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17913) - you deserved it (1927)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:12pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for the first time. I cracked a joke that offended her, so she gave me the silent treatment. I had to pee, and since she wouldn't tell me where the bathroom was, I went to look for it. I walked in on her parents making love. FML

#19243836
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34655) - you deserved it (6060)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:59am - intimacy - by banned - United States (California)

Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML

#19243126
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18950) - you deserved it (2146)

On 03/08/2012 at 11:45pm - misc - by babymine - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

#19231418
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10700) - you deserved it (38294)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML

#19226913
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27009) - you deserved it (1656)

On 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by sdk2010 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML

#19226913
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27009) - you deserved it (1656)

On 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by sdk2010 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, due to the powerful antibiotic I was taking for a bad infection on my knee, I had no control over my bowels and shat my pants while discussing a plumbing problem in a customers basement. FML

#19226157
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19575) - you deserved it (1213)

On 03/06/2012 at 6:53am - health - by beernuts - United States

Today, due to the powerful antibiotic I was taking for a bad infection on my knee, I had no control over my bowels and shat my pants while discussing a plumbing problem in a customers basement. FML

#19226157
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19575) - you deserved it (1213)

On 03/06/2012 at 6:53am - health - by beernuts - United States

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (7492)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, my friend and I walked 3 miles to a Starbucks. We went inside, paid for our coffees and walked the 3 miles back to my house. We forgot to pick up our coffees. FML

#19216079
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7843) - you deserved it (40199)

On 03/04/2012 at 7:27pm - money - by stuff2710 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sneezed while at the office. I felt snot shoot out, but I couldn't see anything on the tissue. I ignored it and went on with my day. When I went to the bathroom hours later, I noticed a huge wad of snot had dried onto the front of my shirt. No one told me about it. FML

#19214388
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19277) - you deserved it (3435)

On 03/04/2012 at 2:36pm - health - by breebree-0 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having a pleasant jog, that is until I was struck by the terrible feeling of an oncoming turd. Being only about 20 minutes from home, I thought I could make it back without letting the beast out. I was so wrong. The only thing I'm grateful for is that I was carrying the Sunday paper. FML

#19207356
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19206) - you deserved it (3001)

On 03/03/2012 at 3:27am - health - by fingerhut - United States (California)

Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML

#19205582
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19588) - you deserved it (8318)

On 03/02/2012 at 10:05pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML

#19204484
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7524) - you deserved it (25874)

On 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by argh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML

#19182988
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8228) - you deserved it (28219)

On 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm - misc - by kal - United States (New York)



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