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honeycutt8729

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honeycutt8729

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3858
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About honeycutt8729 : I'm Kristin & I love rap!!
I read fml because I love to laugh.
I don't care about grammar.
I love working out.
Always in a good mood.
I have a black lab who likes to wrestle, and cheats by head butting me in the leg when I'm cooking.
I'm married...7-1-11
I love to cook.

honeycutt8729's page activity

Visits<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 9:41pm<b>ZackFev</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 2:23pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:29pm<b>euphoricness</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:57pm<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 12:15am<b>iamataco</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 1:08am<b>Heatherx1243</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 10:00pm<b>elsie96</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 4:32pm<b>H3AD8HOT</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 10:53pm<b>Willski</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 3:00pm<b>Sabrewulf</b> - the 04/14/2012 at 9:02pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 04/14/2012 at 4:42am

honeycutt8729's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

honeycutt8729's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

#19289453
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21674) - you deserved it (11900)

On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I had just finished up at work. I was standing on a street corner, waiting to cross to get to my car on the other side. I had three people pull up beside me and ask me how much I charged. FML

#19283430
191 comments

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

#19282725
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7737) - you deserved it (32820)

On 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm - misc - by StinkyandStupid - United States

 Today, I decided to finally try out the veggie slicer I bought a few months ago to make healthy homemade potato chips. Along with the sliced potatoes, I am now missing about a quarter inch chunk of skin from the side of my hand and quite a bit of blood. At least the chips were good. FML

#19281452
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15796) - you deserved it (11392)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:53am - health - by missgayle319 - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

#19281445
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32198) - you deserved it (2020)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:49am - misc - by Bebefer - United States (California)

Today, I got my braces put on. This is the second time I've had them. The first time was after my cousin opened a car door in my face. This time a jock punched me in the mouth for saying that Reese's taste the same as Snickers peanut butter. FML

#19277494
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24914) - you deserved it (5987)

On 03/14/2012 at 4:12pm - health - by braceface - United States

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

#19277345
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10505) - you deserved it (32146)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm - misc - by zztopspinner (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28982) - you deserved it (18126)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

#19276070
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21437) - you deserved it (14402)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

#19275580
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26108) - you deserved it (12719)

On 03/14/2012 at 1:18am - love - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, after she confessed to still being in love with me. I logged into Facebook after she left, only to find her status set to "I think I just made a big mistake." FML

#19272838
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24488) - you deserved it (7860)

On 03/13/2012 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML

#19269452
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37348) - you deserved it (2041)

On 03/13/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Rynne S. - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML

#19268166
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23119) - you deserved it (3511)

On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States

Today, I realized how poor I am when I had to use sharpies to color in the worn spots on my dress shoes before leaving for work. FML

#19265043
204 comments

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29040) - you deserved it (6051)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States



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