hollypocket98

Search for a member

hollypocket98

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1327
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About hollypocket98 : No matter what race you are, what your a fan of, or what your sexual preference is it doesn't matter because I hate everyone equally

hollypocket98's page activity

Visits<b>cornyrob</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 12:49pm<b>ElricMustang</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 12:24am<b>Trollx</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 9:48am<b>wopchop12</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 10:58pm<b>speakersboom</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 3:01am<b>FacelessCruelty</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 3:36am<b>Zaros</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 8:46pm<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 6:30am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 6:20pm<b>jonathanmoore</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 5:27pm<b>Black_Rose97</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 3:37pm<b>newzealand</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 11:58pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 10:32pm<b>lydiaterry</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 12:10am<b>vashhybrid</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 3:24am<b>JFloUnknown</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 5:11pm<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 12:16am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 8:50am

hollypocket98's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of hollypocket98's badges

hollypocket98's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

by fuck you dad / 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up for me. It was going pretty good, then he said he was going to go out to smoke. 10 minutes went by and he still hadn't come back. I called my friend and she said he doesn't smoke. FML

by My Life Is Just PERFECT / 03/30/2013 at 11:29am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2013 at 6:12am / United States / Kids

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

by Kitten_Love / 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm / Animals

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

by andy / 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my current boyfriend and my ex-boyfriend got into a fight about when my birthday is. They were both wrong. FML

by EmberLove / 01/17/2013 at 9:06am / United States / Love

Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML

by shiney100893 / 01/14/2013 at 7:56am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love

Today, I walked into the bathroom only to see my boyfriend sitting on the floor eating ice cream, crying. I'd say I was shocked, but this isn't the first time it's happened. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 3:24am / United States (Montana) / Love

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

by Les Miserables is so sad / 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

by DarkDisaster / 12/27/2012 at 5:16am / United States / Animals

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

by ugh / 12/26/2012 at 9:05am / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

by Read The Fine Print / 11/24/2012 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous