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helen29

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helen29

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  • Number of visits : 1264
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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helen29's page activity

Visits<b>CryosFear</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 1:11pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 11:26am<b>pkfire0</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 7:03pm<b>mantilla</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 6:24pm

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helen29's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65582) - you deserved it (18705)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

#20572069
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22477) - you deserved it (66023)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by SayCheese - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML

#20525408
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31126) - you deserved it (2686)

On 02/28/2013 at 5:56am - misc - by sickofthesmelltoo (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after having sex for the first time with my girlfriend, I realised I was in love with her. I noticed she had an eyelash on her breast. After tugging it a few times I realised it was actually a single black nipple hair. She was so embarrassed, she kicked me out and now won't return my calls. FML

#20426821
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32496) - you deserved it (25182)

On 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by ohman (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, my grandmother and I turned up to a family function wearing the same outfit. FML

#20184947
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22878) - you deserved it (5311)

On 11/30/2012 at 1:30am - misc - by Awks - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

#20184636
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31006) - you deserved it (8800)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by lizzard0416 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I took a picture of myself wearing a whipped cream bra with cherry nipples, captioned, "I hope you enjoyed your dinner, now how about some dessert???" I meant to send it to my fiancé. I sent it by mistake to my dad. FML

#20176010
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18378) - you deserved it (44205)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Whipped Cream - United States (North Carolina)

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

#20172058
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24702) - you deserved it (1938)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:54am - misc - by WamBamSam - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47130) - you deserved it (4591)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

#18891781
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41151) - you deserved it (3374)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

#18754752
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30844) - you deserved it (2307)

On 01/09/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by maruskasommers (woman) - Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj)

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

#18667019
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31330) - you deserved it (7613)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

#18342381
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12923) - you deserved it (45433)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my balls were stepped on while I was taking a nap in the park. The man said he didn't see me lying there. I was wearing a neon orange jacket. FML

#17986528
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27467) - you deserved it (10413)

On 10/15/2011 at 12:33am - misc - by dak-rod423 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I finally admitted that I have to consider buying a nose hair trimmer. I'm a woman. FML

#17894495
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22410) - you deserved it (3619)

On 10/03/2011 at 8:08am - health - by smsmall - United States



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