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hassi158

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hassi158

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 19 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16481
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hassi158's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hassi158's badges

hassi158's favorite FMLs

Today, while on my driving test, the guy told me to pull over and do a U-turn. A few minutes later, he asked me to do another one. After the test, he said I'd failed because the second U-turn was illegal, and I should have refused to comply. I didn't know they're even allowed do that. FML

#21340454
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35128) - you deserved it (4718)

On 01/19/2015 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML

#21340378
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28274) - you deserved it (2575)

On 01/19/2015 at 5:07pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML

#21340194
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28434) - you deserved it (6294)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

#21340142
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30639) - you deserved it (6362)

On 01/19/2015 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML

#21340122
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35860) - you deserved it (2362)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend when I began dozing off. I was then awoken by an explosive fart. It was me. FML

#21340117
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28752) - you deserved it (4802)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I lost a sewing needle in the carpet. No worries, my big toe found it. FML

#21340022
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29847) - you deserved it (3637)

On 01/19/2015 at 1:34am - misc - by momac86 - United States

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33738) - you deserved it (5221)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

#21339798
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27007) - you deserved it (2196)

On 01/18/2015 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by -.- - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

#21339686
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37647) - you deserved it (3279)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm - misc - by pissed out pants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a job interview. It was my last shot of getting a job before my savings run dry. It all went well until I was asked why I wanted to join the company. I got flustered and stuttered, "Because I um, I like money?" The guy gave me the most insincere "We'll be in touch." ever. FML

#21339665
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25807) - you deserved it (7986)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I ran out of cash. The nearest ATM to my house is over a half hour away by foot. After walking all the way there under the blistering heat of the sun, I realized I'd left my card back at home. FML

#21339623
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18128) - you deserved it (19941)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:44pm - money - by saqmuel093 (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

#21339526
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26455) - you deserved it (18569)

On 01/18/2015 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, a customer tried to order a Zinger burger. I tried to explain that he was at McDonalds and that the Zinger is a KFC burger. He accused me of lying to him and tried to report me to my manager. FML

#21339341
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28616) - you deserved it (1969)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:04am - work - by McSlave - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend's dad called me a whore and said I'm trying to use his son and "steal" his virginity for my own needs. My boyfriend has had sex with over 10 girls and I'm a virgin. FML

#21339329
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36780) - you deserved it (2590)

On 01/18/2015 at 1:29am - intimacy - by virginwhore (woman) -



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