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harrypotter955

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harrypotter955
  • Town/Country : Michigan, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 October 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1148
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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harrypotter955's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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harrypotter955's favorite FMLs

Today, this really big woman asked me for some cigarettes. I didn't have any, which made her angry. Angry enough to pick me up, stuff me in a dumpster, and sit on the lid. I still smell like garbage. FML

#20183027
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19420) - you deserved it (1313)

On 11/28/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML

#20173702
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21030) - you deserved it (4209)

On 11/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by but I tried anal and everything (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML

#20173269
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15808) - you deserved it (827)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Ice cold (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML

#20171321
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16915) - you deserved it (1090)

On 11/20/2012 at 6:25pm - health - by RayneSong - United States (Michigan)

Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML

#20168543
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13710) - you deserved it (1118)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by mountains - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML

#20168405
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30404) - you deserved it (4905)

On 11/18/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by besviken (woman) - Sweden (Uppsala Lan)

Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML

#20167650
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16277) - you deserved it (2172)

On 11/18/2012 at 2:45am - love - by jasmith - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

#20158993
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20012) - you deserved it (2411)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19817) - you deserved it (1447)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20513) - you deserved it (1714)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML

#20146253
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3953) - you deserved it (18727)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by justcomesnaturally (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML

#20143987
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16525) - you deserved it (1616)

On 11/02/2012 at 1:53am - work - by whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML

#20140254
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20510) - you deserved it (3140)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm - animals - by Lilly - United States

Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML

#20134692
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17025) - you deserved it (4126)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML

#20134692
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17025) - you deserved it (4126)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)



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