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harrypotter955

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harrypotter955

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2622
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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harrypotter955's favorite FMLs

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

#3267231
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37448) - you deserved it (16152)

On 06/27/2009 at 3:03am - work - by EmployeeOfTheMonth (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66936) - you deserved it (39241)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad with another girl. So did my mom. FML

#2987164
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22952) - you deserved it (106153)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
817 comments

I agree, your life sucks (116010) - you deserved it (72168)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had a pretty big erection while getting checked out at the airport. The security guard was scanning my potentially "dangerous" erection for at least one long minute in front of my wife, kids, and 20 people behind me. FML

#2464637
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44351) - you deserved it (10778)

On 05/31/2009 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother". FML

#2271321
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77589) - you deserved it (4733)

On 05/25/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML

#1807200
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75822) - you deserved it (12238)

On 05/10/2009 at 8:44am - misc - by Jopes (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was in class and felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I began to scream and cry because the pain was horrible, so the teacher called 911. After being rushed to the hospital, I was told that "I had gas cramps and would be fine." My whole class was listening on speakerphone to make sure I was ok. FML

#1167512
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42111) - you deserved it (10747)

On 04/20/2009 at 8:11pm - misc - by Tor (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, at the rehearsal for my wedding, my mother told my bride's mother to fuck off. FML

#1072377
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73613) - you deserved it (3597)

On 04/17/2009 at 11:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my aunt informed me that she thinks I'm faking the debilitating disease I've had for the past 13 years. Apparently she thinks I just don't want to go to college or get a job, and that I like living on disability. She also added that my entire extended family agrees with her. FML

#983343
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72304) - you deserved it (5458)

On 04/15/2009 at 1:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

#958764
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56653) - you deserved it (6420)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm - work - by brad3720 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today , I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money saying its collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then uses his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and wins 500 dollars. The jackass wouldnt split it. FML

#945188
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107831) - you deserved it (15886)

On 04/13/2009 at 4:51am - misc - by AJShow80 - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 5 years getting intimate with my best friend. When they saw me they immediately stopped and said nothing. After about 5 seconds of silence my boyfriend yells "April fools!" April Fools was 12 days ago. FML

#923154
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (122471) - you deserved it (6654)

On 04/12/2009 at 6:47am - misc - by Aprilfools (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friend and I were driving to Florida from Michigan. While going through Ohio my car hydroplaned over a puddle on the highway. I ended up hitting the median and my car got wrecked. Not only am I stuck in Ohio with a car that wont work, I got a ticket for $300 for hitting Ohio property. FML

#909253
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39772) - you deserved it (5731)

On 04/10/2009 at 11:40pm - misc - by emie0209 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML

#880527
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17355) - you deserved it (67638)

On 04/09/2009 at 1:04am - love - by skmusic (man) - Canada (Manitoba)



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