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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I gave my sister some Lubriderm for a skin condition we share. While she was applying the lotion I joking said "Wouldn't it be funny if it made it worse?" Guess who got punched in the face, twice, because it did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8478) - you deserved it (15068)
On 12/08/2009 at 1:53am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, I realized why my 50 year old Dad's 30 something girlfriend looked so familiar. She is in all my parents wedding photos... as the flower girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34002) - you deserved it (1224)
On 11/17/2009 at 10:18pm - misc - by usmcgirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I called my mother who is vacationing in Florida with my dad and sister. Before they left I told them I would be very responsible and that they could trust me. The first thing she asked me is if all the animals were still alive. I said yes. I lied. Her favourite cat drowned in the pool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6758) - you deserved it (25463)
On 11/16/2009 at 12:11pm - animals - by baddaughter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, someone at work was bragging that their son was high school valedictorian and offered a full college scholarship. 7 years ago, I was also valedictorian and got that same scholarship. All I said was, "Congratulations. Did you want fries with that?" and continued taking their order. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31277) - you deserved it (5118)
On 11/07/2009 at 11:04am - work - by John (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I was woken up at 7:00am for a work emergency after a long night of partying. If the 15 missed phone calls didn't do it, the hose water that was sprayed through my window by my boss sure did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20312) - you deserved it (7289)
On 11/01/2009 at 8:48am - work - by bpongplayer (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6217) - you deserved it (28093)
On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9338) - you deserved it (38857)
On 10/12/2009 at 1:36am - animals - by bubbles (woman) - United States
Today, I asked a girl I like to homecoming. I brought her to my house beforehand for dinner with my family. My brother asked her whether we were just friends or dating, she shouts "Just friends!" and then starts flirting with him with me in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29113) - you deserved it (2438)
On 10/09/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by Charon - United States (Virginia)
Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (123791) - you deserved it (4824)
On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (14539)
On 09/28/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by jentown11 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, after working an 11 hour shift, I decided to treat myself to a delicious Krispy Kreme doughnut. When I got home, I sat down, put my feet up, poured myself a cold glass of milk. My dog jumps on my lap and vomits all over my doughnuts, stares at me then bites the doughnut out of my hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32092) - you deserved it (3677)
On 09/28/2009 at 2:41am - animals - by Heww (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at a baseball game. I was eating my nachos when all of the sudden I woke up in the hospital, with my dad sitting next to the bed. Apparently, I was hit with a foul ball. He kept the ball for himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27284) - you deserved it (1994)
On 09/26/2009 at 8:40pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was at a baseball game. I was eating my nachos when all of the sudden I woke up in the hospital, with my dad sitting next to the bed. Apparently, I was hit with a foul ball. He kept the ball for himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27284) - you deserved it (1994)
On 09/26/2009 at 8:40pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43813) - you deserved it (2267)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43813) - you deserved it (2267)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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