Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Online | Search for a member
This member hasn't filled in the description.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, mah boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he startd making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, ( Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1... ) and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
Today , I told my mom that I wanted professional head-shots done 4 Christmas. When asked why , I said "I want to submit them to a modeling agency." My mom exchanged looks with my sister before laughing so hard that she wet herself. FML
Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squrmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to putted up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear an told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML
after soccer practice I was looking for ma dad . Last nigt e was an our late, so I was pretty pissed . Wen I spotted im, I saw im flrting wit a muc younger woman . I ten tried trowing ma soccer ball to is feet, but ended up slamming is ead . Only to find out e wasn't ma dad . big fat FML
Today, I wanted to punish a student 4 being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time 4 him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. real FML
Today, I got a bird as a pet. I tougt it would be funny to putted it on my ead and take a picture. Wen te flas went off te bird flew off my ead and pooped at te same time. You could see it in te picture.
Friday 27 March 2015