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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14706) - you deserved it (43389)
On 01/22/2011 at 11:04am - intimacy - by mortified (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I told my boyfriend about my foot phobia. To help me "get over it", he took his socks off, pinned me down, and rubbed his foot against my face until I started sobbing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27238) - you deserved it (5271)
On 01/07/2011 at 2:10pm - misc - by BiteMe14 - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34374) - you deserved it (6992)
On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29665) - you deserved it (8010)
On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -
Today, my son told his teacher that she "has a nice rack." He's four. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21587) - you deserved it (8129)
On 12/04/2010 at 1:50am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore
Today, I told my mom that I wanted professional head-shots done for Christmas. When asked why, I said "I want to submit them to a modeling agency." My mom exchanged looks with my sister before laughing so hard that she wet herself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20315) - you deserved it (4937)
On 11/29/2010 at 1:01am - misc - by brandiboobarry -
Today, I shadowed an ultrasound technician for my future career. She did an ultrasound on me to show me how to do the job. I found out I was pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39477) - you deserved it (9125)
On 11/16/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by nicolette5785452 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I just found out that my ex girlfriend is gonna be my step mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63607) - you deserved it (3125)
On 11/15/2010 at 6:33am - misc - by xkal174 - United States (New York)
Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10774) - you deserved it (32524)
On 11/05/2010 at 1:29pm - kids - by lilmamma - United States (California)
Today, we surprised my grandpa by being at his house when he arrived. We haven't seen him in seven years. He had a small heart attack. It was his birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19320) - you deserved it (842)
On 10/27/2010 at 6:04am - misc - by Sean - United States (Florida)
Today, after soccer practice I was looking for my dad. Last night he was an hour late, so I was pretty pissed. When I spotted him, I saw him flirting with a much younger woman. I then tried throwing my soccer ball to his feet, but ended up slamming his head. Only to find out he wasn't my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6685) - you deserved it (23414)
On 10/21/2010 at 4:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28073) - you deserved it (4809)
On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6044) - you deserved it (50734)
On 08/23/2010 at 12:18am - kids - by K_M (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to surprise him with breakfast only to find that his other girlfriend had beat me to it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37292) - you deserved it (2994)
On 06/22/2010 at 8:59am - love - by k.love - United States (Utah)
Today, I got a bird as a pet. I thought it would be funny to put it on my head and take a picture. When the flash went off the bird flew off my head and pooped at the same time. You could see it in the picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8491) - you deserved it (29880)
On 06/15/2010 at 12:58pm - love - by Keaton - United States (New Mexico)
Monday 20 May 2013
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