Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

hama806

Search for a member

hama806
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 January 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 257
  • Number of comments : 358
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

hama806's last visitors

mario2012lilhellian420ZombieTourettesGuyFTWKLeePriceUsuariorawr_ily96xbambooImaBossReally

hama806's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of hama806's badges

hama806's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22320) - you deserved it (7072)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML

#20397679
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18295) - you deserved it (1191)

On 12/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML

#20397583
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17284) - you deserved it (1689)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:58am - health - by meranda_johnson - United States

Today, I went on a cruise. I gave my bags to a porter, and tipped him $5. Later that night, my bags still hadn't arrived at my room, and that's when I realized that I'd paid a fake porter to steal my bags. FML

#20397361
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16779) - you deserved it (3135)

On 12/12/2012 at 10:43pm - misc - by McFizzy321 - United States (Florida)

Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML

#20202076
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19379) - you deserved it (1658)

On 12/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I accidentally left my textbook at home. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but today was my class final. Since it was an open-book final, I'd decided not to study for it. I'm pretty sure I failed. FML

#20201964
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6264) - you deserved it (21718)

On 12/12/2012 at 2:14pm - misc - by dumbassgrad - United States (California)

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20553) - you deserved it (4918)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML

#20201870
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21503) - you deserved it (3306)

On 12/12/2012 at 12:51pm - love - by dino0123 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

#20197946
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14196) - you deserved it (5013)

On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

#20197580
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14760) - you deserved it (7346)

On 12/09/2012 at 11:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years drunkenly introduced me to another very special lady. His wife. FML

#20197502
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26061) - you deserved it (2215)

On 12/09/2012 at 9:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I dropped my handbag into a water-filled gutter. As I was hurriedly fishing out the contents of my bag, I looked up. There was my ex, with the girl he left me for walking past, timed exactly to coincide with me manically scooping up one of many rapidly absorbing tampons. FML

#20194448
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17066) - you deserved it (1058)

On 12/06/2012 at 10:11pm - love - by shamefaced (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19242) - you deserved it (1115)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States

Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML

#20192758
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15905) - you deserved it (870)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm - money - by lonelyandcold (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML’s Roommates from hell
  • If we could, we’d probably all live on our own. Exotic dancers would do our cleaning and housework; bartenders would serve us glamorous cocktails with mini paper umbrellas in them every hour on the dot. We would…

Monday 20 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: