Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hallow239

Search for a member

hallow239

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1023
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

hallow239's page activity

Visits<b>vflores</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 12:02am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 2:22am

hallow239's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

hallow239's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend turned down a shower with me because he didn't want to get his hair wet. FML

#16149509
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35392) - you deserved it (5401)

On 05/12/2011 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Georgia -

Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML

#16144015
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13347) - you deserved it (53010)

On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)

Today, as I was filling out divorce paperwork, I realized that my son has had the same girlfriend through both of my marriages. He's 17. FML

#16141236
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19036) - you deserved it (51585)

On 05/12/2011 at 7:09am - love - by Username -

Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML

#16136460
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33718) - you deserved it (12211)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:20pm - health - by anonymous -

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

#16103696
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32497) - you deserved it (2963)

On 05/09/2011 at 11:02am - misc - by scarlet (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

#16101317
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41409) - you deserved it (17440)

On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to give his mother a box of chocolates and flowers for Mother's Day. She just stared at them and said, "What's this for? You're not my daughter, and never will be. But I'll keep the chocolate." FML

#16100276
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44926) - you deserved it (5712)

On 05/09/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after being out of the closet for over three years, I learned that some of my friends still don't believe me that I am really a lesbian. They still think I made the whole thing up because I can't get a man. FML

#16099797
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35331) - you deserved it (7430)

On 05/09/2011 at 12:03am - love - by Just_do_it_17 (woman) - United States

Today, I confided to my dad that since the recent breakup with my boyfriend of 3 months, I feel down all the time and life doesn't feel worth living anymore. His loving advice was for me to "grow the fuck up and get your sentimental head out of la-la land." FML

#16092460
525 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19618) - you deserved it (66272)

On 05/08/2011 at 3:21pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realised just how grossly out of shape I am, when I started violently sweating, felt light-headed, and almost blacked out. All this from helping my sister shift a sofa from the move-in truck to her living room. FML

#16092299
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10153) - you deserved it (31654)

On 05/08/2011 at 3:08pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

#16081373
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37205) - you deserved it (11910)

On 05/07/2011 at 6:27pm - misc - by Mel (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML

#16077554
482 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14224) - you deserved it (84061)

On 05/07/2011 at 11:29am - misc - by BCBUDDY - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized that I frequently argue with myself and respond back. FML

#16075274
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23508) - you deserved it (12196)

On 05/07/2011 at 3:08am - misc - by sillyfox4lyfe (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML

#16075095
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10496) - you deserved it (44462)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:40am - misc - by Kaz (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

#16074880
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13283) - you deserved it (56743)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: