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halley_raven

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halley_raven
  • Town/Country : Seattle, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1812
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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halley_raven's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time when her mother unexpectedly came home. In the rush to get dressed, we accidentally put on each other's shirts. Her mom noticed. FML

#20670515
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44669) - you deserved it (16358)

On 05/18/2013 at 8:54am - intimacy - by lez probs - United States

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

#20669389
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47942) - you deserved it (13048)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML

#20668963
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55928) - you deserved it (5603)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, I tried on a new perfume. When my boyfriend hugged me, he commented that I smelled like his mom. I don't know who was more surprised by the simultaneous bulge in his pants. FML

#20668540
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50113) - you deserved it (3547)

On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML

#20667410
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49726) - you deserved it (5251)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:23pm - love - by paging dr. kevorkian (man) - Netherlands

Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML

#20666690
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49286) - you deserved it (4782)

On 05/16/2013 at 6:24am - misc - by violatedbuttcrack - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up without my fiancé in bed next to me, but I assumed he'd gone to work early. I went on Facebook to find that he had posted a break-up post to himself from my account and set my status to single. I then found a note with "Sorry" written on it stuck to the kitchen counter. FML

#20663501
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50703) - you deserved it (3073)

On 05/14/2013 at 6:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

#20662485
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91760) - you deserved it (5471)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I learned if you type my full name in Google Images, the 3rd thing that comes up is a naked woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star, and most people at school stopped talking to me. FML

#20662282
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58405) - you deserved it (4428)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:15am - intimacy - by magomag (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML

#20661511
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50348) - you deserved it (2768)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I visited my grandparents at their farm. When I went to pee in the outhouse, I noticed a round thing in the middle of the hole, so I peed on it. It was a beehive. FML

#20660609
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40633) - you deserved it (20144)

On 05/13/2013 at 11:06am - animals - by random (man) - United States

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, I was feeling down about being the only single person out of a group of eight friends. Out of desperation, I made up "Jonny", a hot fitness instructor whom I recently hooked up with. Now "Jonny" and I have been invited to a friends' night out. FML

#20659041
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17879) - you deserved it (65950)

On 05/12/2013 at 5:09pm - love - by forever alone - United Kingdom

Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML

#20657738
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47178) - you deserved it (16328)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML

#20657675
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54412) - you deserved it (6713)

On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States



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