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goldfishgod

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goldfishgod

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 September 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3348
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About goldfishgod : Fueled exclusively by beer and horror films.

goldfishgod's page activity

Visits<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 6:18am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 7:47pm<b>angiotensin</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm<b>LegitxNuke</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 11:32pm<b>11bGrunT</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 3:38pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 9:38pm<b>monstermatt001</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 4:35am<b>elkelk</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:13am<b>Hertyn</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 12:02pm<b>Karenezzy</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 4:23am<b>slightlyins4ne</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:03pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:09pm<b>hailey2649</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:56pm<b>Johnny_Boy_Jr</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 1:08am<b>hduebdo</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:36pm<b>Aliceexox</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 8:36pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 9:55am

Liked!<b>monstermatt001</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 2:58am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:35am

goldfishgod's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of goldfishgod's badges

goldfishgod's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML

Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML

#19511561
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24212) - you deserved it (2650)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by Gitana (woman) - Spain (Navarra)

Today, during my first day as a doctor’s intern, I attended a consultation. The embarrassed patient asked me to leave. Not really knowing my way around, I went through the first door I could find. By the time I realized it was a closet, I didn’t dare come back out. Twenty minutes is a long time to wait. FML

#19490705
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (4920) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/18/2012 at 4:41pm - work - by bibou2324 -

Today, I was in the car with my daughter, when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML

#19478782
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5331) - you deserved it (27858)

On 04/16/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by DJ Clitter (man) - United States

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13355) - you deserved it (54618) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

#19455929
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14533) - you deserved it (34468)

On 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while running in the park, I noticed some ducks in a pond. I stopped to look at them and began quacking at them, to see if they would react. This would have been OK had I not been wearing ear-buds, blasting music, making me unable to realize just how loud I was quacking. With people all around. FML

#19449312
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7596) - you deserved it (31924)

On 04/11/2012 at 11:39am - animals - by Quackers (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while my mom was driving me to work, we drove past a lake with an old wooden dock. She stopped the car, pointed and said, "Some guy fucked me right there. I got a splinter in my butt, though, so we finished in his car." FML

#19443097
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36196) - you deserved it (2789)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my morning sickness decided to show itself every time I smell coffee. I work at a coffee shop. FML

Today, in my psychology class, the creepy guy who sits beside me every day leans over and says, "I have an upset stomach, I may have to use the bathroom." FML

#19404760
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18034) - you deserved it (2018)

On 04/04/2012 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

#19401228
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26523) - you deserved it (5245)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by jackmehoffa (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML

#19393049
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24277) - you deserved it (2469)

On 04/02/2012 at 1:38am - kids - by baldspot (woman) - Australia

Today, the magic of witnessing a sheep giving birth was ruined for me when I slipped and fell in the puddle of birth fluids. FML

#19363731
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23418) - you deserved it (4581)

On 03/28/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by 3hoursleftofwork (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my roommate and I realised our freezer hasn't been working for days. This would be slightly less awful if she hadn't been storing dead rats for her pet snakes in there. Let's just say the smell is interesting. FML

Today, my mother told me it's okay to be a prostitute, as long as I make sure the clients pay a lot. FML

#19348653
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27549) - you deserved it (3798)

On 03/26/2012 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Teenagegirl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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