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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I saw an article about how some people think internet access is more important than sex. I asked my boyfriend which he thought was more important. He chose internet access. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13395) - you deserved it (4446)
On 03/21/2012 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by justwow (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8163) - you deserved it (45161)
On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was big, and I replied that whatever size he was, he was enough to satisfy me. Apparently, that was the wrong answer, and he spent the rest of the night sulking because I didn't say he was enormous. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18252) - you deserved it (8848)
On 03/21/2012 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by tellingthetruth (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, my boyfriend discovered you can send sound clips as text messages. So far I've heard 5 of his farts in the past half hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18283) - you deserved it (3025)
On 03/20/2012 at 6:33pm - love - by anonymous - Canada (Newfoundland)
Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22569) - you deserved it (2301)
On 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm - misc - by Laura - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15369) - you deserved it (4610)
On 03/20/2012 at 1:49am - love - by notsober - United States
Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21606) - you deserved it (4532)
On 03/20/2012 at 1:11am - intimacy - by Jen (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17248) - you deserved it (5213)
On 03/19/2012 at 4:18pm - kids - by Evelyn - United States
Today, I had a conversation with another patient in my gyno's waiting room. It was about her getting pregnant in a truck while passed out drunk, her therapist's frequent use of a "For Dummies" books, and how she had waxed and oiled everything to impress our doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13734) - you deserved it (1420)
On 03/19/2012 at 6:37am - misc - by PatientInWaiting (woman) - United States
Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22130) - you deserved it (1868)
On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20575) - you deserved it (3267)
On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)
Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21596) - you deserved it (2183)
On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25477) - you deserved it (4297)
On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30546) - you deserved it (1425)
On 03/13/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Rynne S. - United States (Colorado)
Today, I realized that I am so sexually deprived that I get aroused when plugging my headphones into my computer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17551) - you deserved it (6936)
On 03/13/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Wow (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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