About ghost010 : What's with the kids today, no respect, it's disgusting, learn to control your kids. Parents need to start giving a shit about what their children do and how they act.
Cheaters disgust me, there is no exuse for what they did.
"Seduction isn’t making someone do what they don’t want to do. Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they secretly want to do already."
I don't believe in karma, it does not exist.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49248) - you deserved it (9964)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
I agree, your life sucks (33275) - you deserved it (5380)
On 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8160) - you deserved it (13539)
On 03/14/2010 at 6:50am - misc - by Hatty (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I got home early from work. When I got home I got to see my dad chasing my mom around the house, naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23408) - you deserved it (2595)
On 03/12/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by ugh - United States
Today, I learned that even though they say that an apple a day keeps the doctor away, it doesn't keep him from putting a Q-tip up your ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16571) - you deserved it (2714)
On 03/11/2010 at 9:44am - health - by captainkevineff - United States
Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22824) - you deserved it (1777)
On 03/09/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by CreepedOut (man) - United States (New York)
Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14103) - you deserved it (4655)
On 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm - health - by gotitEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15179) - you deserved it (8386)
On 03/05/2010 at 12:17am - animals - by Catois (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42856) - you deserved it (6382)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was on a date with a guy having a great time. I went up to go to the ladies' room, but as I walked back to the table, I heard some giggles. I looked and found out why. My skirt was tucked into my underwear. I was wearing my lucky Star Wars-themed panties. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26945) - you deserved it (10703)
On 10/03/2009 at 2:41pm - love - by diva467 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56532) - you deserved it (3659)
On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)
Today, I was walking with my girlfriend when a little guy walked up and flirted with her. I'm a pretty weak guy and he looked weaker, so I gave him a little push and said "Back off". He's actually not weak at all. I've got a black eye and a girlfriend who won't stop laughing to prove it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10831) - you deserved it (32659)
On 09/27/2009 at 2:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me because I didn't fight some guy that started hitting her right in front of me... In a dream. She was totally serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51691) - you deserved it (2740)
On 09/20/2009 at 9:21am - love - by dreamdude (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54697) - you deserved it (12530)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28466) - you deserved it (2991)
On 08/22/2009 at 5:29am - kids - by naughtyshirt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 17 June 2013
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