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gatorgurl2996

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gatorgurl2996

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 398
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>Poppy8127</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 4:03pm<b>olpally</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 12:47am<b>malheartsnutmeg</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 4:34pm

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gatorgurl2996's favorite FMLs

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

#20465397
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31764) - you deserved it (2117)

On 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm - animals - by bull-stuff - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML

#20462590
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38919) - you deserved it (3295)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

#20461359
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31354) - you deserved it (2789)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

#20461046
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42127) - you deserved it (7010)

On 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm - intimacy - by itsrathersmall (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

#20460540
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40391) - you deserved it (4216)

On 01/15/2013 at 9:41am - kids - by Nightmare (woman) -

Today, my mother came back from her trip to Vegas. Her breasts were obviously 2 letter sizes larger. I asked if she got a boob job and she denied it, saying that it's against her religion. She's an atheist, and a liar. FML

#20460160
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33589) - you deserved it (3067)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by Brooke - United States (California)

Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML

#20456974
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37957) - you deserved it (4782)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by Mary - Czech Republic

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

#20456674
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46343) - you deserved it (7919)

On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, during an hour-long drive, my sister told me she's lost her "faith in humanity", because one of her friends bought his 8-year-old son an iPad. She uses this stupid expression all the time, and I got so pissed off that I forgot to brake at a red light, rear-ending the car in front of us. FML

#20454301
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10071) - you deserved it (46502)

On 01/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by lostmyfaithinblowjobs (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was yet again asked to show my hall pass. I'm 23 and work at a middle school. I've worked here for the last five months, so not only do I look 13 years old, I'm also not memorable enough for my own coworkers to recognize me. FML

#20454196
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35700) - you deserved it (2767)

On 01/11/2013 at 8:11pm - work - by Can'tAgeOrMakeFriends (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

#20453278
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35164) - you deserved it (6892)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

#20453156
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27868) - you deserved it (7542)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

#20452458
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31140) - you deserved it (2623)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34191) - you deserved it (2763)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22303) - you deserved it (6686)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)



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