garebear13

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garebear13

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1669
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About garebear13 : Blah blah blah

garebear13's page activity

Visits<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 12:38am<b>yellow33</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 6:42pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 6:03pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 2:05pm<b>DreadedSamurai</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:16pm<b>LivClaire96</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 4:00pm<b>loidnerdy101</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 3:56pm<b>specialist8404</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 9:16am<b>JillianBall</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 9:26am<b>life_sucksbro</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 7:30pm<b>1Michael1</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 11:45pm<b>myusernametaken</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 10:32pm<b>Lingfucius</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 3:30pm<b>beardownarizona</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 4:44pm<b>huntchinn11</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 6:24pm<b>PHATERTL</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 12:15am<b>scfann11</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 8:07pm

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garebear13's favorite FMLs

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

by warp_routine / 03/31/2009 at 10:17am / United States (Vermont) / Health

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

by Noname / 03/11/2009 at 3:37am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, a guy informed me that the cute, really tiny little leather bracelet with little silver hearts and several snaps that I'd found in a head shop is actually a cock ring. I'm a girl. FML

by fashionVictim / 03/08/2009 at 4:35pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon as we pressed the up button on the elevator, the fire alarm went off. FML

by SoClose / 02/03/2009 at 9:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my mother called to say that my 11 year old nephew found my secret stash of nipple tassles, furry hand cuffs, and a bottle of lube. He doesn't want to visit me anymore. FML

by peneloperigby / 02/03/2009 at 1:51am / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Kids