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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
galt's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Money
by Anonymous / 02/13/2013 at 5:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by kenyaliving / 02/13/2013 at 5:04pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML
by please leave... / 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking to my dorm room while it was snowing heavily. I saw a girl in a wheelchair trying to get up a slippery incline. Being a good person, I asked to help. I'm a pretty weak guy, and I couldn't push her up. She wheeled away crying because she thought she was fat. FML
by IMadeAHandicappedPersonCry / 02/12/2013 at 11:57pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML
by BadLuckCarson / 02/12/2013 at 12:55am / United States (Iowa) / Love
Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML
by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born and only took one of the two tests. I haven't cheated. He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checked again. FML
by Totallyscrewed / 02/10/2013 at 12:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, my furnace broke down, almost a month after its twenty year warranty expired. It would have been replaced for free. Now I'm going to have to take out a loan to afford the $4,000 replacement. FML
by chillyinside / 02/10/2013 at 12:03am / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, after much coaxing, I finally got my roommate to loosen up and have a couple of beers with me and my friends. It was only later in the evening that he admitted the real reason he hadn't wanted to drink: he's an alcoholic and had been sober for six months, until now. FML
by mhmm... cumsquats / 02/09/2013 at 6:26pm / Belgium (Brabant) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, the office coffee machine was relocated next to my desk. My co-worker insists on making several cups of the stuff per day, but instead of drinking it, he stands next to me, audibly swishes it through his teeth, gargles, and drools it back into the cup. I retch every single time. FML
by UuuuUUUUhhgghghghGHh / 02/09/2013 at 12:21pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to unpick a wedgie in the street. I backed against a wall, lifted my skirt and sorted it. I then turned around and caught eye contact with several men in the barbers behind me. Not such a solid wall after all. FML
by chattyloz / 02/07/2013 at 7:31am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by fviz / 02/07/2013 at 4:51am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…